Friday, March 29, 2024

Hubby caught in act with maid

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After 10 years in marriage, a woman has asked the Lusaka Boma Local Court to grant her divorce because her husband has been having sex with their maid.

This was heard in a case in which Ruth Banda, 38, of Lusaka’s Woodlands township sued her husband Benjamin Mwansa, 46, of the same township for divorce.

Banda told the court that problems in their marriage started in 2008 when her husband started insulting her in the presence of their children and maid.

Banda said Mwansa referred to her as a useless woman and that he started returning home late. She said Mwansa told her not to question where he had been or why he was returning home late.

Banda also said Mwansa started refusing to eat her food and he stopped making love to her, saying he had found a very active woman who cooked what he liked.

“Every time I asked him why he refused to eat the food I prepared and make love with me, the answer was ‘I have found a very energetic young woman who makes me more happy than you do’,” Banda told the court.

She said she no longer receives the love she used to get from Mwansa but that he was fond of their maid.
Banda said she tried to have the matter resolved with elders, but so far nothing has been done because Mwansa pretends to love her in the presence of his relatives.

She told the court that a “few days ago” she found her husband “in the act” with their maid, a single woman who occupies their servant’s quarter.

“I could not believe it because I regarded the maid as my own sister whom I trusted very much. Even now I have no words but to seek divorce before I get depressed in this house,” Banda said.

In defence, Mwansa told the court that he had nothing to say because he was waiting to be divorced.

He said, however, that he has no problem with Banda apart from her being too lazy to cook and do other house chores.

Mwansa said since Banda wants to have the marriage dissolved, he had no choice but to go by her wish, especially that another woman at the village is waiting to be picked by him next month (July).

Senior presiding magistrate Elipher Mwewa rejected the appeal for divorce and ordered that Mwansa and Banda reconcile.

The court also ordered that Mwansa ends his relationship with the maid and with the woman he intends to bring from the village.

Magistrate Mwewa said there is a tendency by some men to divorce their wives without justification and advised Mwansa to ask the church or elders to help resolve their marital problems.
[ Zambia Daily Mail ]

48 COMMENTS

  1. Iwe Mwansa keep yo wife and stop the nonsense. Ruth Banda is yo proper wife and true friend 4 life. These other women probably just love yo pocket and perhaps are just stranded. Remember yo wife has sacrificed a lot 4 u and these other women have also done lot with other men outside yo knowledge. Dont worst yo 10 yrs after all Banda na Mwansa ni pachimbuya.

  2. Mwansa be serious with your family. these things are all the same. There is no guarantee that you will have some one you truly love. Stick to your wife and stop being childish. Look after your wife and your children. That maid has other men she loves and not you – you are just wasting your time on her. mwatisebanya mbuya! My sister just forgive this man – he needs help.

  3. Ruth, thou shall not give away your house to another woman over energetic skills you need to acquire. Get Alangizi and do not let ba kambwanga steal your love and your house! No, gelo. Kosapo. He is yours. Just have HIV status established.
    Ba Maid will always be a problem if you over trust. Worse with cooking. No.
    It might be mid life crisis for Mwansa where he has to prove himself a man at 46… afraid that ubulumendo bwa lapwa. Your new antics will assure him that he can be made to sweat!
    Let no maid put assunder what the Lord has made lawfully yours.
    Banda and Mwansa…Bless you.

  4. mwansa, all that 10 years you want to waste over a woman who just wanted to impress you for a while and you want to coast your marriege? look at your children, they need you two guys to get examples as they are too preparing for their futures, remember you two are the best teachers to your children and everything they will see from you is what they will learn.

  5. Ruth, have your hubby tested for HIV, if he refuses leave him, ukafwila po fye mwandi, staying and is a risk if you truly found him having sex with your maid.Remember old habits die hard.If he hasnt repented or isnt showing any remorse just go he will continue to insult you in the presenc of your children and a new maid.Theres more to life than be insulted and treated like trash.You are a human being who needs to walk out when you have reached a dead end.Shipikisha club kale yapwa, theres HIV nowadays its not worth the risk.

  6. it is really nice to see people encouraging our sister to cope with this heartless man. however i dont think it is wrong if she leaves this a.s.s.h.o.l.e coz even in the bible it it allowed to leave such a man or woman. going by the man’s response i dont think he wants to live with this woman. and if my understanding is correct then this woman is just being thrown into the lion’s mouth. such men can be very dangerous. i hope GOD will help this woman to find the way out of this.

  7. most ladies are too lazy nowadays and never want to respect their hubbies..too bad..a sin occured due to ur negligence Banda..

  8. I do not agree with the court’s decision to salvage this marriage, this poor woman will be infected with the deadly HIV/AIDS, that is assuming she is not already in trouble. For this woman to decide to divorce this guy, she must have endured too much. This Mwansa guy is useless, disrespectful, insensitive and mean-spirited, he obviously does not care what happens to his family, all he is thinking about is his sexual desires. He does not want to be in this marriage anymore, he will never stop sleeping with hired help even if the other woman from the village joins him. He thinks he is God’s gift to women. The past will catch up with him, beware of Kashishi it is so much there.

  9. Foolish knowledge in Mr Mwansa–the devil is using you–Find Jesus and you will never think of such foolishness–you lucking wisdom Mr and you can only get it from the Lord

  10. I don’t condone the husband’s behavior but the judge should not force this reconciliation.

    Unlike other emotionally tortured Zambian wives, this one who smart enough to get out while she is still alive. – Way to go Mama. Run for your life!.

  11. If they both want divorce no judge should force them to reconcile. Judges wake up. Don’t sentince people to death with your old beliefs.

  12. I agree with the court that this marriage should not come to an end. Both parties need to respect each other. The man should learn to humble himself and say sorry to his wife for this matter to work out. Even if the husband brings another wife he may not change his deeds. I will advise them to look for a humble Pastor to help and reconcile them. God bless this marriage.

  13. The problem with most girls nowadays is that they are just too lazy, they give very little sex to their husbands. You can go out with a girl for long time, but once you marry her she starts taking things for granted. There are other women out their, if you as a wife doesn’t give what I want, I’ll go and get it elsewhere. Life is too short to be missin out on the pleasures it offers just for the sake of marriage.

    If you are not happy in the marriage my friend move on and enjoy life instead of sticking to a marriage that has very little to offer.

  14. #22 I feel sorry for men who talk like this.No wonder we have so many broken marriages with men who think like you.Who gives you the right to insult me and disrespect me and at the end of it all want sex.I wouldnt give you.So this man Mwansa should check himself.You dont know what this woman has endured.There are men who still go out to look for other women even if their wives are treated like sex slaves and servants so you dont know………

  15. Ha ha ha ha. Well mwansa is right too. If the woman does not cook well and clean, then what do you expect? A lazy woman is lazy everywhere even in bed. Believe me. If she can’t clean the house, herself and cook she becomes a wound that never dries. In short she becomes unsweetened or useless. Mwansa is right in some way.

  16. Ruth, run for your life!!!! If this man is busy having women left right and centre even one on standby for July, RUN my sister, the judge has absolutely no right to enforce reconciliation. SAFETY KULI MWENA, ukaisanga ku E…. na topping ine ilafillwa.
    The kosapo brigade is in an era where respect prevails not this case.
    Good luck and be strong.

  17. Ba Mwansa you started refusing to eat food and stopped making love to your better half, in preference to your maid.”Mudala wansebanya”.

  18. # 18, ndobo: you are the only stupid one here!
    Too bad for Banda because her husband seems to have made up his mind to divorce her but can not initiate it. He is just trying to make her look like she is the one who wants divorce and yet it’s him. Doing his maid is utter nonsense, he has no class. Caution to women, don’t employ attractive girls as maids and accommodate in your quarters coz you are just making it easy for your men to cheat, especially if the maid has taken up your duties like cooking etc. No matter who we are, we all have a hunting instinct but how we respond to that is what differentiates us, don’t make it too easy for your husbands.

  19. Mr. Mwansa, there is no woman waiting to be picked from the village it is the same maid you’re planning to pick. But how do you say your wife is lazy and does not cook for you when you have been refusing to eat what she has been cooking? those are lame excuses. walitemwafye ntweno. And you judges why force people to reconcile when you know deep down that these 2 will not stop doing each other. The best was to divorce the two.

  20. Wives stop being super star’s u know men are volnerable. the best way is to SUBMIT (dont try bedroom purnishment) u c the reparcations. This is now bringing shame to the children/relatives and the nation. SUBMIT to one another. God hates divorce.

  21. I dont know but i think Mwansa is really been shagging the maid. She is also been giving him a full cup. Nowthe courts decision lucks something. In my humble opinion, the court should have divorced them & fined MWANSA heavily without repair. What is taking place is a deliberate move by Mwansa to have access to more shagging of the sexy maid. Maids are ever like that-2nd wives. I for one would not like to ve a maid & rather ve my own siblings or her siblings-better. Although there wives siblings that take the floor too. Mwansa will continue frastrating his family. When a man finds what thrills him about sex-he never gets back until something tragic happens. It may happen later & eventually affect Banda too. May Banda appeal. People, Mwansa has found the sweet hole….he will not stop.Us men

  22. LT its not Magestrate, it Local Court Presiding Justice. Now on the issue at hand, lets not bury our heads, most of us have got the same problems as Mwansa. Only thing we pretend very well to make the situation look well.

  23. Sorry Ba Mwansa u are a dissapointement! maids always look for something in a home. Please learn not to talk to them , when u speak to them its professional issues only…..work related not waoneka bwino lelo!!!!!!!:-?

  24. U knw wat its the ladies of nowadays who are bringing these problems. a man needs love. and most important good sex. u cant just change cause of wearing the ring. they forget were they come from.am talking from real happenings not research or hearsay… Give your man some “Mampi Love”

  25. Wives watch out! dont take us husbands for granted.Remember there are sex predators in the neighbourhood,worse still in your own homes as maids.I will do the same if my wive becomes big headed and stupid.

  26. This is crap. How can you order two people to stay together … give the woman a divorce, this guy is not even apologetic.. whats the point!!! This is terrible judgement by the court, this guy should pay his wife damages and child support, forget saving this marriage, we can throw all sorts of religious rhetoric at them, but this man obviously doesn’t want to be with this woman … nafipwe fye

  27. Sad story indeed, but Bwana Mwansa learn to humble yourself. The world is just too small and you shall never be satisfied with its provisions particularly those women you are fond of will lead you to an early grave. Please, refrain and keep up with your good wife. Actually, she is your second mother.

  28. most women are now insultants and never respect their husbands..are too lazy and can;’t cook or even wash..too bad you caused ur hubby to commit adultery!

  29. Ba Mwansa mukulu kuleni naimwe. Amafi banyela apatali. Kuti walanyela palukungu awe bane cakana. Kabiyeni mubweshanye na Bana Mwansa remember efyo mwafwayene tamwalelala. Ebakashi benu

  30. Condemn not and you shall not be condemned . We all live by the grace of God we have all sined in one way or another.sin has no grades and is all the same mr. Mwansa sinned and needs forgiveness. For those who are condemning him if you have slept with more than one woman or man in your life you are a sinner as well or if you lie you are no different from him. Just looking at someone with sexual desires is equivalent to adultery and fornication.Let us pray for him.

  31. Banda should appeal. Infidelity is a ground for divorce if one cannot forgive. This Magistrate Mwewa is wrong here. He wants to kill Banda. Morality is not law.

  32. Mwansa feels he is a star. I feel sorry for this woman because she will continue to be abused by this selfish husband. Naimwe bana mayo, behave like wifes, cook and keep the house clean, you may have a maid but the ultimate responsibility lies with you as owners of the house. Again, our women should continue looking after themselves and looking attractive so that their husbands are proud of them. For you Mwansa, you will cause pain for a lot of people when desease catches up with you, foolish man!

  33. it’s not that easy to just work up one morning and start being an animal towards someone you have kids with and be so ready to divorce. there is more to this than meets the eye

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