Researchers have confirmed divorce has lasting damage
on children.
A recent study in Britain found that children whose parents
divorced are more likely to perform badly academically.
Th children, according to the study, are also more likely to
suffer from depression.
In short, divorce harms a child’s well being.
“Divorce has repercussions that reverberate through
childhood and into adulthood.
” Children from disrupted families tend to do less well in school
and subsequent careers than their peers,” researchers say.
They explained that children are also more likely to experience the
break-up of their own partnerships.
The researchers tracked around 17,000 people born in
Britain during one week in 1958 over the course of their lives
to arrive at this conclusion.
At their 50th birthday anniversaries, the researchers compared their
lives with other sample groups born in earlier and later years.
From the sanmples, the study has confirmed that children born in 1958 were much
less likely to experience parental divorce than children today.
Family break-up was subject greater social stigma, something that was sometimes
thought to contribute to the problems experienced by the children of
divorced parents.
ZANIS/PTI/ENDS/MM
Yep, I guess the environment of bringing up a child has a lot to do with their development. My parents divorced when I was 5, so when I started school, I was in group 3, a system that was used to stratify pupils in class. Group 3 meant you are among the dumbest and dullest in the class. I skipped school most of the time because I hated it. When my mother remarried and we moved towns, the change was swift and dramatic. I moved to group 1 and was top of the class until Grade 12. Now I have an MSc. Not all kids are as lucky. My older half-siblings, from my father’s first marriage, experienced two divorces – their mother’s and my mother’s. They made stupid choices along the way..ctd
One was a victim of teen pregnancy, and early marriage. She is now divorced, with 3 kids to look after. The other one willingly dropped out of school, he is unemployed, has a wife and kids to look after and is HIV positive. Could all this be due to the divorces?
# 1,2 touching experience.A parallel situation in our country may be the smilar experience like you have shared, but due to death of one or both parents leaving young kids. And congrats for your hard work and blessings.
That can only happen to British children. Here we have a lot children who grew up without parents either through divorce or death but they grow up performing well academically.
Divorce is from satan. Why even do research. we know the effects already.
I might just agree with #4, I’m one of these children and I won’t list all the exams I passed. The list is too long.
#5 I think you know that one of the reasons for research is to confirm/verify what is generally believed to be true in socio-economics – I hope you don’t assume research is only about new findings. In this case research may have just affirmed/confirmed the position of the bible on the matter of divorce (some times research may just be an academic exercise, I agree).
fyabasungu ifi mukwai.
Worst thing would be a child growing up with married parents in a make believe, loveless relationship!
Number 8 are absolutely right…fyabasungu? such studies are sponosored by drug companies? for instance USA is pill popping society? if you have noticed failures are the ones that tend to blame their childhood or dwell on the past? you would be amazed at how quickly these physicians we entrust with our lives Rx anti-depressants. A muzungu friend had trouble with his teenage son, went in for the so called “counseling” and they both came out with Rx for anti-depressants? I asked my friend if he never exprienced any trouble during his teens and if his parents took meds to overcome the situation? I do not understand what happened to simple logic with abasungu?
NUMBER 4 U MUST BE STUPID TO SUGGEST IT ONLY HAPPENS TO BRITISH CHILDREN
Wow! What an absurd argument.
Couples should also know that marriage is not all roses through and through.It is better to strke a balance between endurind marriage upheavals as well as not to succumb to uncalled for beaviou from a partner.It is not good to jump for divorce at every difference and its not good for children to live with warring parents.When two elephants fight its the grass that suffers.As parents we need to be responsible enough for our young ones so as to offer thema good start in life.Divorce is never good but the actions that lead to divorce are bad
Happy are those whose marriages are based on mutual love for they certain last to time indefinite. But what is marriage when there is no love at all!!!? the days of shipikisha club are gone and they indeed proved to be very costly, in some instances spouses paid with their own lives. Damn it! Nobody will marry to divorce tomorrow but! there are somethings one can not change e.g what is bad is bad, Period!. But i also want to disagree because “not all children from the so called broken homes are dull” Because we are many who, despite having had no father or mother around during our childhood, have succeeded and i mean academically. Ubufi bubi. Learn to love before you marry, ALA!
I am one of those who grew up with one parent (mom) and I have done well at school and for myself. I am runing my own business at 22 and building a 4 bedroom house in makeni.
It all depends with ones mental strength
A man divorce his wife of sixteen years and took responsibility of all the six children. Today all are well educated with fine jobs and four are happily married.
It all depends on how the marriage ends
#11 Bo Nyambe what I done to warrant insults from you. I was mere express what I know about a Zedian child. Am I one of those who grew up from a divorced marriage and I did very well academically and I know a lot of children who went through broken marriage are well off than even those whose parents’ are marriage still intact. Like someone mentioned its only muzungu who can be affected academically by their parents marriage problems. Bo Nyambe is being in diaspora affecting you.
Even muzungus are just human beings, what makes the difference is the evironment in which children grow up.
Ni Nkani ya bazungu ii. In african society a child belongs to the community. Actually most children in zambia today are better off in happy broken homes than in homes where there is a father and mother who are always fighting. And in any case most children are too busy trying to figure out where the next meal will come from, to worry about the pschological effects of their parents’ marriage. Lets be real bane, too much TV is blinding your reality
There is an element of truth to this you chaps.Just wake up.
It all depends where you come from (up bringing) in most african setups we believe in extended families which preaches love and unity regardless of who your mother or father was but the coming of the nuclear family is destroying everything
Kangwa you are right on the button!!!!!!!!!!
Please, some interested researchers can trace PULE’s children for the next ten years and see what happens.
AM I THINKING ALOUD: Is Malone Zaza a product of such Divorced marriage no wonder lasting damage on him. ZNBC mentioned his grandfather as the one who brought him up. No mention of father or mother! Sorry guys cant help thinking aloud!
I grew up without a father. He divorced my mother when I was a baby. I grew up with a very good step father who has continued to be with me despite my mother’s death 11 years ago. I have a top job and went to school all the way to UNZA without any difficulties. When my wealth father (biological) died two years ago, I did nt feel it. It was like its just a dog that has been knocked down by a fast car. Now these are the true feelings that children have towards cruel divorcee parents, male or female. Thank God I am well married with 4 daughters, all of them with a “one mother one father” lebel of pride. In my 19 years of marriage, WE HAVE NEVER FOUGHT, NOT EVEN POKING A FINGER AT ONE ANOTHER.
No 26 Contd.
Of course we have had differences. Actually our children think we have never even quarrelled in our marriage. I AM NOT PERFECT, NEITHER ARE WE A PERFECT COUPLE, BUT WE STRIVE FOR EXCELLENCE IN OUR MARRIGE.
NEVER EVER MARRY AND DIVORCE LATER, with or without children.
JESUS SAID ( when asked as to what was good for man, to marry or not to marry)
“” it is good for man to marry but better for a man NOT to marry””
I concur wit #4,i never grew up wit my dad,he died wen i ws in G5 but stil since he had divorced my mum wen i ws 6.i entered G1 while stayin wit one parent.I cn tell u i have been doing well in class from the time i started G1 till university.tho somehow the care of one may recieve frm one parent may nt be enough ,i dnt think it has much to do wit doing well at school in some cases.If one parent cn afford to sponsor yo education guess if u hv interest in learning then u cn stil go far.
#28 contd i meant the care one may recieve frm one parent
Guys ask Dr.Dan Pule for advise
First people should not marry for wrong reasons such as pressure from family or society, financial reasons etc. I come from a broken home where my mum and dad constantly fought and it was traumatic. When my parents divorced we had a much happier life and we love both of them dearly. we ar all grown ups now and have happy lifes. A marriage of fights and insults coming from the matrimonial bedroom is traumatising for the childrens. Divorce can save children a lot misery and ending up in wrong places such as bars and the streets all becoz they dont want to here their folks fighting. As long as it is done amicably and childrens priorities and future comes face divorce is fine
mwebantu ine we dvorced wen my boy was 1yr and nine months and lelo he is 11 yrs, i brot him up alone elo took him to very good schools and he is very intelligent, and well mannered better than thoz with both parents. oh see me, im such a proud young mother. Lesa talekelesha especially if u were unfairlly dvorcd, ena alapala all the way. and who suffers? the one who let u down…oways
The problem is ba gelo bapa zed ba konda John maningi, thus why the end up into marriage when not fully prepare for it.
IT is the universal truth that somehow the kid is effected if there is absent of one among the parents. so it is better not to marry , and if married then not to devorce if you got any kid….
This all depends on a case by case basis. I know for sure that in our close knit ‘circle’ of friends (c. 10), the tops ones (about three) grew up in single parent homes. However, they are the ones with MScs and drive SUVs.
DIVORCE is nasty, but some people just love pity parties.I have relations who took their parents divorce to themselves and gave up on their lives,in hopes gettn their parents together and we are talking very bright children,from a very wealthy background.I am being raised by a single parent but I am a whole lot better,I am from an average background.I took the right turn success,for my mother,siblings and I….. ITS ALL ABOUT SELF.
I agree with all to the facts of Divorce and the heartaches it causes to both parties not forgetting least the siblings who are forced to bounce their love between parents and whatever steps parents take after their divorce. But,and this is a big but,”that should never be excused to stay in an unhappy marriage” Please remember that this research we are having a dialogue about is based on Britain. In Zambia parents pass on their cultures and way of life down to their siblings and so forth. Whilst in Britain,kids have more rights than their parent and it’s for this reason that kids in britain don’t do as well as expected, in most things as they luck strict parental guidance. Mum bits hurray!
wow!
interesting reading! am caught up in a very depressing situation. I have just realised that my wife has been having an affair. We have 2 children and she is expecting the third. What is more painful is that she is pregnant, and she has been seing this man during this pregnancy. Please please advise for am contemplating leaving her.
My kids handled our divorce well, though I can not say very well b’coz its not easy to know what really goes on in each of the kids thoughts/minds. What I know is they are a happy brady bunch who have moved on. They do not mention their Dad neither do they miss him. By the way Im living Overseas with all my kids and he is in Zed languishing. I am a very happy person and has never known happiness to be this way, I have gained weight and fighting to lose it hah hah hah!
#39, Wait until your wife gives birth. Have a DNA test to verify that you are the father of this baby. If you are not, do DNA test on all the remaining children. Keep the ones that are yours and let those that are not yours go with their mother to their father(s). If you are strong enough to forgive the alduterous wife then dont divorce
balumendo na bakashana pa nsanka napabula chipuba,elyashi elili pamwela likankala sana eicho uli namano nasendepo ifyamano,tekwesha ukukokelela abakashana na balumendo abasosafye efya mungulu ukwabula ukubomfya sikopo.
Oh please! This is all just rubbish. My parents divorced and I didnt have to bounce my love between anyone. I continued to love them both. My grades didnot go down either. This is all rubbish from the West and their cultre and people are trying to apply it to Africa. Hre, your parentd divorce and so what? They cant be together anymore but you can still love them. And as for your grades if you blame it on your parents, thats you cheating yourself. You’ll be the one that pays later
Sometimes divorces are ideal solutions if the interests of children are put first. Not every divorce ends well but then again it depends on circumstances. Sometimes it may prove to be damaging and at other times it works well. So it is not correct to generalise and conclude that Divorces are damaging.
go ask Dr. Phil.:d