I am being pressurised to get married-Mampi

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Songstress Mampi has openly up about her frustrations about not getting married and not having kids.

In a candid posting on her Facebook page, the songstress known for her raunchy onstage dances said is getting tired of answering questions about when she is getting married and why is not having children.

Mampi said she will only get married when God gives her a compatible partner and will not do it just for the sake of pleasing society.
“I have been getting a lot of people asking why I’m not married yet and i felt like i needed to address the elephant in the room. I am certain I am not the only single woman facing such kind of pressure to get married. When are you getting married is becoming a popular question not only to me but many other women in our society. I would have chosen to ignore this and focused on my interests but i decided to take this opportunity to speak for me and many other women who are subjected to such pressure,” Mampi wrote.

She observes that that kind of pressure has pushed many women into marriages of convenience for the sake of fitting in which leads so many women into unhappy marriages, high levels of divorce and in worst cases Gender based violence.

“Marriage is a beautiful thing and when one enters this institution it must not be because society pressured them to jump in but because they found the right partner and they decided to get married. Secondly, it’s very unfair to make single women feel bad about themselves just because of their marital status, icibemba chitila ati “ubushimbe tebulwele” so stop treating it as such.”

She added, “As for me, I am a strong independent hard working woman who believes that marriage is not something you just wake up and jump into. When i do find someone i am compatible with someone, whom i share the same values with and loves me for me not because of what he saw on stage or who he thinks i am then i will gladly do it. I will not just date or marry anybody that comes my way with a proposal to impress the society.”

“One thing I’d love the public to understand is that life in the limelight is not for the weak at heart, you ought to be smart enough to know that some men will fall in love with your image and not you as a person this is one of the many reasons why i can never rush into such commitments without wisely scanning potential spouses just cause he can fit a ring on it ,no i’m not doing it, i will not marry to please society otherwise I would be misleading so many people that look up to me that its okay to succumb to the pressure,” she said.

“Another question is “when are you having a child?” Honestly just stop it. We are more than that, yes children are beautiful and mothering should not be limited to entering labour ward because being a mother is having a heart to raise a child which am already doing ..I am mothering my nephew whom I love whole heartedly which makes me a mother.”
She says she will not have a biologic child whose father is not her husband.

“As for many single moms I have great respect for you as mothers hustling it it out for those beautiful kids and my not having a child as a single woman is just a personal choice. i will not do it because this is me and these are my principals and i live by them. I believe that not many moms planned to be single moms it’s just circumstances that put them in such positions and some of them it could have been cause of these same pressures of expecting women to have children at a certain age,” she said.

Mampi continued, “For those still bothered about my marital status. i will get married and have children when God provides me with a suitable partner and if not I will stay happy knowing that my creators purpose for me is not just about marriage and kids because those are just blessings instead.”

“For those that know me well, it is clear that I’m not moved by the worlds perception of me if i did i would have drowned in it lost my way but NO i know who Iam and for all you single women out there facing these challenges do not allow society to define you, only your creator has the final say in your life..being single aint a crime so stay that way until God brings the right man focus on your goals, find yourself and know that marriage wont complete you..it only compliments.”

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38 COMMENTS

  1. Poor Mampi, you are better off with a good career as it will always sustain you. Zambian husbands are useless. They focus on side chicks and alcohol not on family and community advancement.

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    • Your time will come. But again you seem to have been pounded many times like no man’s business.

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    • Chilepule baby. Don’t worry about detractors, do your thing girl. Life’s too short to waste time worrying about gossips

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    • @Nubian is right. Thanks for that comment.
      This is another reason I didn’t want take one of you artificial; wig covered, make-up smeared, thick fake butts, show-off Zambian women.
      I was so fuuucking tired and I still tell my friends and cousins to learn how to treat women.
      I am working on opening “Romantics Science College”.

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  2. Come on! Has any same man proposed to you and you said no? That cookie has been smashed by all sorts of characters and no man worth his salt can want to put a ring on it. Wish you all the best though! I just laugh when every Jim & Jack claim there are people that look up to them like seriously!

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  3. Beauty matters as well. Its not only the ability to dance. Oh and history matters too e.g. how many times that cookie has been pounded!

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  4. Good girl. It’s best to wait for the right person. Avoid divorces and avoid one parent families. Or worse warring ex-partners affecting the health of their children.

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  5. She should just say it is a tricky thing for a female Zambian musician to get married because of certain misconceptions associated with female public figures

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  6. Those guys talking about cookies being pounded are the weak men….
    If u think u r a real man get yourself one experienced cookie and demonstrate yo manhood.
    Mampi is much stronger and cleverer than most Zambians on this blog…
    Additionally,she has the correct attitude… She doesn’t give a f#$k what we all think or say about her on this blog…

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  7. That’s difference with living in other parts of the world where career and well being matters more…in Europe couples can be together for even 10 years and still call themselves girlfriend and boyfriend but in Africa you do that and your future in-laws will be on your door after a month wanting to know what is going on and why you are using their daughter.
    For women, Music Industry it is a give and take; look at Beryonce she thought she would get away with being married with children and dancing seductively on stage but it didn’t work. Mampi can say want she wants but her being a woman at that age she is on time bomb even M’bilia Bel especially Tshala Muana had to reinvent themselves at some stage…just hope you have invested wisely for your future.

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  8. You useless men talking about history and her cookie being pounded should go to hell. Why do want people to live with the guilt of their past forever? You saw her being pounded by many men? Zambians let’s be mature in our contributions think before you type please. What she is saying is what a lot of women face and has led many to be in such despair. Let her peacefully speak for those going through this and thinking they are alone. If it doesn’t affect you be quite

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  9. Let’s face reality here guys! That cookie at this stage is well serviced. Unless you want to marry her for the little money that she has to-date made.
    Unless you are dis-functional man.. tight cookie rules!

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  10. Marriage is something that should come & be prepared by God himself .People should therefore wait for their arranged time to time come and not to rush into getting married just to please people around them (sham) marriages as a results we are having marriage break ups here & there because just from the word go people had no intention of being a husband or a wife to someone .My sister wait God’s time is the best.Our time matters less.

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  11. You are too old you should get married don’t mislead your fellow ladys. Get married to enjoy better life.

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  12. very well put mampi. very articulate and on point

    you guys trying to throw dirt at her, stop it. double standards. so what if she’s been in other relationships prior? so what? she’s an adult.
    some Zambian men think that it’s their god given right to do all sorts of things and when a woman does the same they start crying foul, wake up.
    mampi, continue working on your projects and living your life. those close to you know you and what you stand for. get married when you’re good and ready. don’t settle just because.
    big up to strong, outspoken hard working and independent women worldwide.
    wilabomfwila those asking you when, simply tell them you’ll let them know
    kalebalika mukwai

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  13. Ba Mampi naimwe…it is not ‘principals’ but ‘principles’. Ubushimbe bulapenya I feel for you. Just have a kid we will understand. Ama guys want the cookie not the commitment. We thought you once hooked up with Clifford Mulenga or was it Herve Renard (or both)?
    Mushota (PhD), any words for your sister? Sharon, where are you?

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  14. oh maybe too beautiful or too pretty to be married. Such chaps as Mampi guys just share them untill they run out of juice.
    Beware of side chicks when you get married Mampi but keep your hubby. No need to fight side chicks. Most men have them. Its a rule mama!
    Disaster.

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  15. My belief is that you cannot discuss any vital issue with an average Zambian. They have no mental capacity to stay on the topic and discuss anything objectively. No wonder you vote without understanding the implication. Majority of Zambians have no good attributes e.g manners, honesty, planning, responsibility, accountability etc Its all missing. Sorry situation. We have no respect for our country and for one another. Most young people are focused on buying cars, drinking, stealing at work, corruption etc. We are destroying this country and its future. Take note!

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  16. A good spouse can be a source of stability and security. In Hollywood, marrying and getting married are the order of a normal day. Life continues even as a star.

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  17. I totally agree with Mampi. Most Zambians marry because they are pressured by society and consequences are usually catastrophic. After watching married couples with children or seeing them in magazines, they feel it is also time to get married and have kids. They usually have “ready made wives or husbands and kids in their heads!” Shortly after, when their expectations are unfortunately not met, they start looking for side chick and abandon their families to try to satisfy their ego. This end up in marriage break ups, divorce or misery to the families. Continue with your wisdom and wait for the right man to marry. If you ever do not have kids, it was not meant to be so. You should never be a contributor to the growing numbers of street kids (and they are a nuisance!)who were sired by…

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  18. Seriously speaking marriage is a blessing. When you get married you enjoy the fruits only if you exercise high levels of discipline; no cheating, hardworking and sober mind. Mampy don’t say God will provide start it and God will guide you let’s not be too religious on this one but show the capacity to do what is instinct in us. In South Korea image they are not too religious but manage in almost everything technology, education, agriculture and cultures and society (including marriages). Let’s not stop narrow minded comments and advice our sister constructively and objectively. When you are born you are a product of Dad and Mum so it’s up to you to find a better person who is disciplined and sober attitude and who is loving and not a womanizer who can take care of you big time. It’s…

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  19. My girl you are beautiful come to a Negerian I will look after you well well trust me

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  20. I remember in Big brother, she was told to remove the wig so that the real face of mampi shows up!
    The problem is Mampi went out with so many married men. The women prayed for their husbands to see sense.

    Bashi Mumbi in Kitwe, eish….

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  21. The state of the Zambian men: This is better defined by the level of lowlessnes and hypocrisy of the Zambian men today!!! The honest opinion is that Zambian men are unfocused, dishonest, drunks, lazy, hypocritical and downright unproductive. They use their energies on wrong things. Meanwhile, the Whites, Chinese, Lebanese and Indians are busy making big time money. You would be damned to get into an engaging argument with a Zambia man because they are extremely petty and this is right across the spectra of society – politics, corporate world, media (sadly), colleges, varsities and wherever else. Well advised to stay clear of the lines, or you would be dragged down to their level of sheer pettiness.

    Zodwa is denied entry into Zambia, with absolutely no discernible value accruable from…

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  22. … her visit, and all the Zambian men go ballistic. Believe me all these ‘fits’ require a energy — a whole lot — that would be used elsewhere. What an unproductive bunch!!!

    You may not like Mampi and may not agree with what she has said but that does not give you the right to insult her and say all the things you have said. It may serve your ego well but it reveals a lot about who you are and not what you are. The state of the Zambian men is at a very bad place.

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    • But it is you who has insulted men for having divergent view,you are critical only in your small mind.

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