Children are surely a blessing from God but rarely do people think about how their relationship may change after the birth of a baby.
Researchers have identified the transition to parenthood as one of the most challenging milestones in a relationship. The birth of a child can bring couples together or push them apart.
Some couples in distress believe that having a baby may bring them closer and help them resolve differences. That is a big mistake – and mainly because the relationship may not be able to withstand the stress that comes with a new baby. Although couples who start off on shaky ground are more at risk for drifting apart after the birth of a child, couples who start off in a secure relationship, may also falter under the tremendous stress of parenthood. Becoming parents as well as partners will make a difference to your relationship. Couples who adjust to parenthood find their relationship is enriched and a great source of strength and support for the demands of parenthood.
Ideally a couple should develop effective communication patterns before they decide to parent. Discuss what traditions and values are important for you and your baby. Define your roles in the house. Who is going to help the kids with homework? Is dad going to help bathe the kids or put the kids to bed for instance.
If your relationship is on the rocks try these tips:
1. Write down a list of all the reasons you chose your partner.
2. Tell your partner why you appreciate him or her.
3. Donâ€™t watch TV on selected evenings and turn off the computer.
4. Ask your partner for help and be specific.
5. Each write down a list of little practical things that would make you feel loved.
6. Hold hands while you resolve a conflict.!