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Alba Iulia
Tuesday, September 22, 2020

Puppy love makes teenagers lose the plot

Headlines Puppy love makes teenagers lose the plot

Adolescents who claim they are “madly in love” might not be too far off the mark: a new study suggests that they show almost manic behaviours.

Serge Brand of the Psychiatric University Clinics in Basel, Switzerland, and his colleagues surveyed 113 teenagers at around 17 years of age, asking them to complete questionnaires about their conduct and mood and to keep a log of their sleep patterns. Of those, 65 indicated they had recently fallen in love and experienced intense romantic emotions.

The lovestruck teenagers showed many behaviours resembling “hypomania” – a less intense form of mania. For example, they required about an hour less sleep each night than teens who didn’t have a sweetheart. They were also more likely to report acting compulsively, with 60% saying they spent too much money compared with fewer than 30% of teenagers who were not in love.

Moreover, the lovestruck teens were more than twice as likely to say they had lots of ideas and creative energy. Worryingly, they were also more likely to say they drove fast and took risks on the road.

“We were able to demonstrate that adolescents in early-stage intense romantic love did not differ from patients during a hypomanic stage,” say the researchers. This leads them to conclude that intense romantic love in teenagers is a “psychopathologically prominent stage”.

They add that psychiatrists should take this information into account when assessing adolescent patients who are having trouble sleeping and are showing other behavioural changes.

The symptoms of hypomania overlap with those of mania, which is diagnosed as bipolar disorder when accompanied by periods of depression.

Journal reference: Journal of Adolescent Health

61 COMMENTS

  1. should teenagers be dating? Very few of us ever got to marry our first high school loves.Wasn’t it just madness resulting in unnecessary heartbreaks,depression and sometimes unwanted pregnancy? I cry and not eat if my chi boyfriend didn’t come to see me from ndola over the weekend.I look back and think how dumb!My daughter will be banned from dating until she produces a degree.

  2. The wisdom of hindsight indeed!It is just like saying grade three ‘long division’ is easy just because you are in ninth grade. Guided experience is better than an outright ban, I think.

  3. bulungumune would you support parents being very involved in their teens dating experience to the extent that your daughter tells you with excitement that “he kissed me today!”
    When I was a teen I believed sperm could be transmitted in saliva.I could not even dream of telling my family of my first kiss let alone the existance of my boyfriend who would have been a perfect secret had it not been for my neighbor.

  4. cece you are hilarious! Unfortunately I think all our mothers tried to warn us but we never took heed.I still have trouble with saliva!

  5. The parental hand is absolutely necessary.Dating is exploratory for many teens, guided or even misguided by reckless half truths or mischievious misconceptions from peers. Should parents stand aloof as their teen is led astray by ‘nursery school rhymes?’ Or, is it responsible to let your son try out his predatory instincts at the expense of developing wholesome long lasting and mutually beneficial relationships.

  6. “No Degree No Dating””Thats no possible unless u goin give that degree to yo child in the hse.Dating z no bad as a teen,its develops u into an experienced geek.U dont want to be 24 & still dont know how to handle men or women

  7. with teens of today, you just have to create an open relationship with them.You need to know when your son/daughter is dating someone and you should know who it is as well.when the “friend” visits he/she must enter the yard and not just whistle from the gate!!We have to discuss relationships with our children and instil in them the knowledge that at different ages, you enter different stages within a relationship.It is easier then to discourage teen sex.Currently parents treat the issue of sex with so much secrecy that the children rely on their “enlightened” friends for guidance..end result is pregnancy and/or disease!!Look at the wild behaviour of boys and girls at university/college once they have their “freedom”!!If a child is taught about being responsible within a relationship from home..we are likely to reduce the wild and reckless behaviour they get up to when they go to college/university.

  8. interesting.I have a relative who believes she has an open relationship with her teenage children.She believes they are attending prayer meetings on friday evening,though I know they are “partying”. When I was a teen my parents were quite strict and even when I got the freedom at university I still found it unnatural to go wild.Not that I was an angel.So I’m not sure if being open with teens works.Maybe we should define what being open means?

  9. Inonge,we have to tell them that having a relationship is not a crime.we have to teach them that it comes with certain responsibilities both to themselves and us as their parents.there is no absolute solution but that doesn’t mean we cannot try!! Your relative Inonge,probably condemns partying and hence they have to sneak out to do it.If they were allowed to party and categorically told so, with the right advice when they are out partying,you may find that 2 out of 4 Fridays they WILL be at a prayer meeting!!Teens do things becoz they think they are missing out…so within reason expose them and not make too much of a big deal over it.I think it is all about instilling responsibility in these kids.Once a child knows that ” anything to the extreme is bad” we as parents have a better chance of raising responsible citizens!!

  10. Wanzelu I don’t think teenage dating teaches you how to handle women/men.I can assure you no matter how many women you date you will still not understand a woman.Maybe you will learn how to be a sweet talker or player.I prefer teens having casual friends not boyfriend/girlfriend.In such a case the teen is exposed to a larger number of personalities.Having just one boyfriend restricts you to always hanging out with this one person whom you are unlikely to marry anyway and the pressure to start touching each other increases.What happens before your twentys is just plain nonsense.I say stick to a group.

  11. Is there anything unique a teen experiences in dating, specifically, that can not be nurtured in other more culturally acceptable ways, like visting and helping some old relatives,arranging a birthday party for a sibling or something like that?

  12. original pundit they say like minded people are attracted to each other.So how come I attract jerks.Its no longer amusing.
    Anyway,on the other hand I found your statement of a guy whistling at the gate funny!But in the zambian culture isn’t it disrespectful to bring a boyfriend in the yard.Are we trying to adopt the western culture here.
    I think a firmer hand is needed for daughters.

    cece I’m not sure how you are going to implement your strategy.How do you prevent your daughter for ‘falling’ for one of the boys in the group.

  13. The best answer is to teach the teens that there is time for everything. One gravy mistake like early pregrancy or contracting STI can ruin ones life. If both boys and girls can understand this they have a better chance to lead better and responsible lifes. When I was in secondary school there was a girl was twice our age and we used to mokey her about her age. She regret so much for making mistakes in life for being pregrant three times with six years to make worse was she always passed with good results to go form 3, but she could not go becuase the law didnt allow such a thing. The same happened when she wrote her grade 9 twice. This meant to join us again in grade 9 whilst breast feeding. You can imagine have a child before you have a foundation and a stable life. Education is the key we should be open to our kids to teach them the good things of dating and the reasons why its bad.

  14. Inonge(13), on the “jerk” front i can only offer my sympathies.The one thing about “jerks and jerkettes” is that they are never selective!Even when they know they don’t have a chance in hell they still “go” for it.What i do is find something funny about it and move on…life is too short to worry about twits who don’t know their station in life!! The “whistlers” are the most dangerous characters who by virtue of being anonymous tend to be very irresponsible!When the “whistler” knows the girls parents know him, he will think twice before influencing the poor girl into doing something stupid. As for Cece’s strategy it is a non starter.With these kids it is all about how much self control they have.At a certain age your hormones are raging so it is important at this time as a parent to reinforce responsibility in a child.Irresponsible kids are “hitting” second or third base by the time they are 15 !!Cece should think about mob psychology and what trouble that brings!!

  15. Original Pundit, i salute you for your thoughts in comment #10. I have always held that view, it is just that i could’nt master enough vocabulary to put it accross in the very simple manner that you have done. Allow me to add to, and “spoil” your contribution with a bit of phylosophy.

    “I WILL NEVER GO TO ANTI-WAR RALLY, BUT IF YOU HOLD A PEACE RALLY INVITE ME, I WILL COME!!” These are words attributed to Mother Theresa. What did she mean? I Think it is the fact that Preaching against war will always bring more war. But preaching Peace will promote more peace. Being “pro-peace” achieves better results than being “anti-war”. WHAT YOU RESIST, PERSISTS. That is sound phylosophy.

    I believe this is the reason why the Bible says something to the effect that the law (mosaic law, 10 commandmnets) came to REVEAL the sinfullness of man, not to HEAL the same. what (heals) delivers from sin is the preaching of righteousness as opposed to preaching against sin.

    Always telling your teens what they should NOT do will only make them be conscious of the negative and therefore go ahead to do the same thing you have forbiden them to do!! That’s a paradox. But it is true.

    For a change, stop telling them what not to do and start telling them what to do!! I rest my case.

  16. Born Rich(16), your analogy hits the nail squarely on the head.You have actually made me start reading up on Mother Theresa!!She was indeed God sent and her place in heaven is well deserved.
    When we were teens, there were fewer influences than there are now.During my time,ZNBC used to cut kissing scenes but now, nudity,fornication and all forms of perversions are for all and sundry!!How things have changed.Raising a teen now is more of an effort and more “technical”!! God helps us all!!

  17. Yes the good old days when we could watch ZNBC with our parents without squirming in our chairs coz of a funny scene.To come to think of it I wasn’t even allowed to see the censored kissing scene!
    I agree with #16 the more you ban something the more appealing it becomes.So if your teen asks you one day if its okey to kiss his/her boy/girlfriend what do you say?

  18. Inonge(18), the fact that your teen even asks is a victory in itself!!Firstly you explain what a relationship is,then the various stages two people go through as it progresses then you you explain the responsibility that comes with embarking on the “touchy/feely” stage!!Teens must appreciate that platonic relationships are not old fashioned.The theories of “bases” has to be explained so that when they decide they are ready to “hit” third base it is against the backdrop of complete information.Teens think “giving” quickly is showing how much you “love” and this is what is getting them into trouble!!Teens need to understand that there is no shame in virginity and that it is the one thing they should guard most jealously.Teens think “giving or being given” shows you are now an adult….a horrific misconception as we adults have come to realise…n’est pas ??

  19. Inonge(20),J’aurais voulu continuer dans le language le plus romantique au monde mais les autres lecteurs vont etre irriter…donc retour a l’anglais.

    Better safe than sorry !!

  20. Ah! tu parles le francais tres bon pour un homme zambien! J’oublie ecris en francais.Ou est-ce que tu avais appris? je suis heureuse! je ne veux pas retour a’l anglais!

  21. Inonge(22),how can you forget,it’s such a beautiful language and more expressive than English!!I noticed a bit of rust but i’m sure your spoken word is good.Funny,i should converse with someone called Inonge in French!!(i’m tickled !!!)I would love to tell you where i learnt the lingo but that might take the shine out of being anonymous…but i will let on that i have been to the Louvre several times!!For the sake of world peace we better stick to English!!!

  22. Inonge(22),Comment avez vous pu oublier,C’est une si belle langue et beaucoup plus expressive que l’anglais.J’ai remarque un peu de rouille mais je suis sur votre facon de parler est meilleure.Bizarrement, Je devrais discuter en francais avec quelqu’un qui s’appelle Inonge…
    J’aimerais bien vous dire ou j’ai appris la langue mais cela enleverai une partie du my’stere d’etre anonyme…mais j’ai ete au Louvre plusieurs fois !!
    Pour l’amour de la paix dans le monde parlons anglais !!!

  23. wow,Perhaps I should enrol in the nearest alliance francaise.est-ce que tu est zambien? Peut-etre tu est un professeur de la langue francaise?

  24. il faut que je revise mon francais. il n’y a personne qui se plaint que nous parlons en francais. Please correct my grammar!

  25. Inonge(27),it might be a question of correcting each other!!Imagine forwarding a technical document in a language other than your mother tongue??I’m no teacher,mes intérêts sont plus dans les domaines techniques et les secteurs spécialisés du commerce. La France est une heure partie d’où j’ai vécu pendant des années ainsi elle ne devrait pas vous étonner que j’ai dû apprendre quelques langues pour passer.It’s been a while and i must admit this is getting rather addictive!!By the way,you cannot get more Zambian than me!!Where did you learn yours from??

  26. I don’t think I’ll be correcting you anytime soon! Did you really have to write a technical document in french! whoa! well from the way you write it must have been a breeze! J’ai appris a l’ecole il y a beaucoup d’annees.

  27. i have the great misfortune of having to deal with interesting characters who prefer to conduct business in French even when their English is far better than mine would ever be!!!ce peut être travail dur et prises le long de temps.For someone who learnt it sometime ago yours is pretty good.If only Zambians realised the advantages of learning languages like Spanish and Portugese.With the calming of waters in Angola and Mocambique, we should be looking to exploit the numerous opportunities these countries present.We need to encourage languages in schools from primary right through to varsity!!You should be able to do a civil engineering degree/diploma with a minor in Spanish!!Quand je suis président que je change des choses ainsi observez dehors pour moi ! !

  28. Ah vous voulez etre notre president? Bon! don’t forget chinese! whether we like it or not china is becoming a force to reckon with. Who doesn’t want to do business in china these days. Peut etre un jour tu vas ecrire un papier technical en Chinese!

  29. Yes indeed….president !!!I have seriously thought about learning Mandarin.Apparently there are versions of Chinese to learn so it seems quite a mammoth task!!I doubt i would ever be good enough to do anything technical in Chinese……i have enough headaches with English!!J’espère aller là bientôt.Have you been?I’m told you need to have translator on hand for the trip to be worthwhile and to ensure le poulet sur le menu est vraiment poulet!!!

  30. tu est si drole. je n’ai pas arrete de rire!Dit moi est-ce que tu as l’ordinateur francaise? Je n’ai peux pas utilise des accents! Est-ce que tu as manger “escargot de bourgogne” sounds like a fantastic dish hey!

  31. yah is this a french club? Go to a french blog you two.Now back to my theory on how to raise teens. I don’t agree that restricting my teen will make her want to rebell more.I don’t believe teenage dating yields anything positive.Encouraging her to be involved in things like sport, science clubs extra than pairing off with some ***** I think is is better.

  32. #34 cece
    The best you can do is to engage your teens into meaningful and inhibited comunication. There is alot that you can accomplish that way.

    Adopt ways that empower your teens to make good decisions on their own. Give them reasonable space to make these decisions. “*****s” also go to sports and science clubs. Your teens must be prepared when an “*****” begins making advances on them while at the science club!

    After all has been said and dine, There is NO safe haven without. The safe haven is within. It is in their ability to stand up against pressure and make good decisions, not in some sports infrastructure!!!! This is not passed on genetically, it is learned.

  33. #34 cece
    The best you can do is to engage your teens into meaningful comunication. There is alot that you can accomplish that way.

    Adopt ways that empower your teens to make good decisions on their own. Give them reasonable space to make these decisions. “*****s” also go to sports and science clubs. Your teens must be prepared when an “*****” begins making advances on them while at the science club!

    After all has been said and done, There is NO safe haven WITHOUT. The safe haven is WITHIN. It is in their ability to stand up against pressure and make good decisions, not in some sports infrastructure!!!! This, you must teach them. It will be their responsibility to learn.

  34. Born Rich(35+36), it’s quite obvious Cece is constantly hoping the ideal situation prevails all the time….the truth is the quite the opposite as we all know !!
    Teenage dating Cece, teaches them to realise that there is no mystery to the opposite sex and prepares them or gives them an insight as to what to expect when they are older. Call it what you like but ” forewarned is fore armed / practise makes perfect !!”
    Cece..why is it that you have a group of old ladies giving “marital tips” BEFORE you actually get married?According to your line of thought that should be done away with as well becoz you find out for yourself once you are married !!

  35. Inonge(32),we will always marvel at technology!!I may be able to speak/write and understand their language but God forbid i have not developed their sometimes peculiar food preferences!!!A major feature of their countryside are frogs on wheelchairs and crutches !!!
    33+34 seem to have developed a problem with our mode of communication….something i expected, although rather late i must admit!!

  36. #37 no no no we need those old ladies marital tips, marriage is life long so we need all the advise we can get on how to deal with and please bashi mwana! But teenage dating is useless you don’t learn anything.I learnt more from the male friends I went with to college than the guy/s i dated.By that I mean social interaction.Anyway my daughter is bearly out of her diapers so I have a number of years to plan how to prevent her from teen dating.

  37. oh la la mais j’aime parler en francais. Sorry guys,I haven’t met a french speaking/writing zambian since…years ago.Mon amie nous sommes continuer perhaps we should put subtittles!

  38. Inonge(40),peut-être nous devrions mélanger anglais et Français alors qu’ils ne s’occuperont pas… ce qui vous pensent ?I just wouldn’t want an all out war being the pacifist I am !! Subtitles would work if WE DIDN’T work for a living.

    CeCe(39),marriage is a lifelong date and you would be better at it if you have had some “responsible” experience whilst a teen !!! I know you want the best for your daughter and i wish you the best of luck in making “teen dating” alien to her !!!When she reaches her teens you better find a good doctor/psychiatrist becoz you will need one……..when i’m through with mine i would be happy to pass them on to you !!!

  39. oui I guess we can melanger anglais and french.how am I doing so far ha ha ha.So when are you finishing your sessions with your shrink? peut-etre you are the shrink doubt anything would send you to a psychiatrists office! Unless ofcourse you are…

  40. Inonge(42), people find it strange for an African to visit a shrink ever so often.Sometimes it helps to deal with lifes challenges.Why wait until you reach a stage of standing outside a mall talking to yourself or chasing passing cars like a dog or worse still, using the New York Times as a dietary supplement!!!tous les nous sont un peu fous en ce monde !!!!

  41. Born Rich where are you ?? I trust your USB cable and interfaces are keeping you horrifically busy, but spare us a minute on these pages too !!

    Please post the ISBN for the book ” “WHAT YOU MUST REALISE IS THAT THE PERSON YOU CALL YOUR MOTHER, IS MY WIFE!!”

  42. Original Pundit, I am very much around. It is just that i am quite busy fixing a USB port for the cute girl next door!!! ha!ha!ha!

    About the book, It is by a certain american clergyman i was watching on TV, I have been trying to search the book on the ‘net but to no avail. I guess it has a different title. I think the one i said is the title of the book was just the core massage that that this father was trying to put accross to his son.

    I am told kids sometimes fuel their fathers’ jealousy. The chaps are always crying and breastfeeding from their mother the whole day and night. What they do not know is that all this time, their fathers are “burning”!

  43. oui guess we needn’t wait so long to make a booking at the shrinks office.perhaps if Born rich sends us the ISBN for all the books hes reading we shant need to go to a shrink!I like what he said in Cost of a better life #2. what is your view on that topic Original P? What he said was true though I wonder what effect it has on kids and wives living away from their father for many years.

  44. Born Rich (45),welcome to the land of the living!!You are spending too much time in “cyberspace”.Aren’t you lucky ba neighbours comm ports need so much of your attention and expertise!! Good to have you back.I’m not holding my breath as to how long we can keep you away from your “preferred vocation” haahaaa haaaa !!!

  45. Inonge(46),that Max character is the very epitome of a self centred and selfish husband.He doesn’t care or appreciate his family at all. Family comes first.The initial sacrifice of being away doing his masters was enough.Even with 10 PhD’s he will never be able to make up the lost family time.I personally despise people who make children and wives suffer so much just to achieve selfish ambitions.Why marry,why have kids? people must make responsible decisions about their lives.Chances are that when the bugger gets back if ever..he will feel his wife is not good enough for a PhD holder and he will start behaving “funny” and the marriage is doomed!!To every rule there are exceptions but in my experience that family joins the endangered species list !! UNZA/CBU has produced so many Max’s so there is alot of precedence to cite !!

  46. #46 Inonge
    #48 The Original Pundit

    A friend of mine, who happens to be a fellow blogger on LT once told me that “THE MOST IMPORTANT THINGS IN LIFE ARE NOT ‘THINGS’ !”. What a wonderful statement filled with The Wisdom of the Ages!!!!.

    The statement, i think embodies the gist of what i have been able to digest from your contribution in #48.

    Having said that, it is important to understand the difference between:
    1. What Max is doing.
    2. How he is doing it.

    I am of the opinion that WHAT Max is doing is something good and desirable BUT HOW Max is doing it leaves much to be desired!!

  47. Born Rich(49), are you familiar with the saying:” It is not always that you must DO just because you CAN do !!” Whenever you look at the drinks cabinet in the house the last thought should be….I’m going to drink all of it today no matter what!!In life,i believe,there are somethings that we ought to have done and still need to but won’t, for the sake of world peace,harmony and love!!Only someone who is not selfish would think like that and it is evident Max does not appear on that list !!
    If his wife found someone else to fill the void he has created,how many of us would be sympathetic or indeed how many would blame the poor lonely souls he seems to enjoy leaving behind!!

  48. #50.The Original Pundit
    It is very interesting because the same friend told me something to the effect that “There are things which you MUST NOT do, even when you CAN do them!!”. I think that is what you are trying to say. Forexample, it doesn’t mean that when one is able to impregnant 1,000 women then they should go ahead and do it. (Sorry for using a crude example!!)

    However, i still think that Max can do his PhD without subjecting his family to such heartache. There is a rational or “scientic” solution to max’s dilema. Listen to this:

    Science is a body of facts based upon some proven principle. For something to be said to be “scienfic”, it must produce the same results, under the same conditions WITHOUT FAIL. Where am i driving to?

    “Not everyone who goes to do a PhD subjects his family to the kind of pain that max is doing to his family. It does not happen this way all the time. IT IS NOT A SCIENTIC FACT. Meaning it is something that max can avoid, but still get his PhD!!!” By:

    1. Coming back after his Masters
    2. Later on, Relocate with his family to do a PhD. This can be difficult but I have seen people do this. Meaning it is possible.

    Max may not necessary wipe out all difficulty, but he can surely redice the impact of his education on the family.We live in a world of possibilities!!!!

    But if he wants to pursue his PhD in the radical manner he is doing, “The Law of The Opposites” will visit him in a radical manner. If he does it in a tactical manner, the law will visit him that way. It is as simple as that.

  49. Inonge,just finished a very confusing assignment and very dissappointed at the lack of entries on our pages !! Les sujets se font rare ou bien les gens juste tros occupes.Koi de bien excitant dans votre vie ?

  50. ah mon amie bonjour. J’ai eu beaucoup de faire a mon travail. comment vas bien? J’espere votre assigmnent was not in some weird language! Happy “belated”independence day to you and born rich!

  51. Inonge(54),it was in english thank god.to be honest i had it with this job…….time to move on !!souhaitez-moi la chance.

  52. tu n’est pas content avec ton travail? Job satisfaction nothing beats it if you have it right?I envy those who do what they love and get paid for it!

  53. Inonge(56),its not that i’ve “fallen out of love” with what i do, its just that i have done it for too long.changez est toujours bon !! I’m enrolling for a Mandarin class and who knows maybe a challenge from the Orient may present itself !! You enjoy what you do ??

  54. Original change is good.One of the best years of my life was when I was constantly learning new things, meeting new people and seeing new places.There is something I’ld really love to do but somehow don’t have the courage to do!I get intimidated at the thought that people go to school to acquire or sharpen the skill which I just have a ‘talent’ for!Quest-ce que tu pense?

  55. Inonge,it is so sad the average African does not value meeting new people and seeing new places.The typical African would seldom priortise a holiday unless bundles of shopping money is available.Travelling and only returning with a t-shirt as evidence is sacrilege!!I suppose time will change this mindset.Talking of intimidation..i get intimidated by people who have skills i could never have!!For next year.. i’m changing my life around…learning a new lingo & a trip 2 the Orient,souhaitez-moi la

  56. Inonge,it’s so sad the average African doesn’t value meeting new people and seeing new places.The typical African seldom priortises a holiday unless bundles of shopping money is available.Travelling and only returning with a t-shirt as evidence is sacrilege!!I suppose time will change this mindset.Talking of intimidation..i get intimidated by people who have skills i could never have!!For next year-i’m changing my life around..learning a new lingo & a trip 2 the Orient,souhaitez-moi la chance!

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