I have been married for 5 years but the past 2-3 years I feel I have fallen out of love with my husband. I think the biggest mistake I ever made was accepting to marry him in the first place.I was 24 years at the time recently graduated from UNZA and felt the pressure to marry.Pressure came from relatives who always passed comments at my always being on other peoples wedding line ups.Well, when my then boyfriend of one year felt we should marry I thought it was a good idea.
Over the years living with him has become a struggle.I find every excuse to be away from him.He is generally a good man but I feel sometimes we have nothing in common anymore.Ok I’ll say it, he bores me to tears.I would love to get out more,visit different countries,visit game parks etc.Even taking a trip to Livingstone to see the Victoria falls to him is an issue.I swear even RB has more spunk than my husband!
Recently my brother was going to Tanzania to pick up a Japanese car and I jumped at the idea to go with him.I planned to visit one of my friends living in Dar es Salaam.My friend promised to take me on a site seeing trip to Mount Kilimanjaro.This was a chance of a lifetime but my husband vehemently refused saying it would be a waste of money. I went to Tanzania anyway.Its not like I couldn’t buy my own air-ticket.I’m as financially sound as he is.I had so much fun especially seeing mount Kilimanjaro.I met some nice people in Tanzania who I felt I shared more interests with than my husband.I extended my trip because my friend wanted to show me around. I felt so alive and had so much fun.I dreaded coming back to my dreary house.
My husband was cross but I didn’t let him dampen my spirits.Luckily we do not have kids so I think that makes it easier to walk away from this marriage.
My aunties think I should stick it out and one day I’ll grow to love him but hey life is short and I’m not getting any younger! I want to go places, achieve my hopes and dreams, perhaps one day meet someone more intellectually stimulating than my husband.It aint cutting with this dude.My trip to Tanzania opened my eyes.There are people out there with similar goals and interests like me.Why should I playhouse with this man who bores me tears.
So what do you think should I divorce him and get it over with or stay with him,learn how to make chikanda for him as he wants me to and hope that someday by some miracle my love for him will be rekindled.I’ve never wanted to carry the label divorced woman but ya ya ya ya ya I don’t know what to do.