By William Phiri

There are a few things you need to take into consideration before you Date a Zambian Girl;

1. They have a skewed conception of Western life. They believe that everyone in the West, especially America, should look like a Movie Star. They are critical of what you wear. Take time to educate her that the “life” she sees in movies is just what it is, “Acting.” Assure her that there are regular People who live ordinary lives in America and Europe; that they wake up in the morning and go to work. They work hard to make ends meet just like in Zambia.

2. Get a Car. Whether you rent, borrow or steal one, get one. It’s a shortcut to her heart. If you have the big Range Rover or Mercedes, you can even Date the President’s Daughter.
I used to work as a Driver. None of the Girls at Church knew and none of them ever talked to me. One day my boss asked me to work on a weekend and later in the afternoon I went to Church with his Car. Believe me, even the Pastor’s daughter came to greet me. I had ladies all around me. Also carry your keys in your hands, don’t put them in the pocket.

3. When you finally get one (Kasha), do not buy her gifts. Jewelry, flowers etc., will not be appreciated. Give her Money. Give her Money. Give her Money.

4. They don’t like public affection. But if you give her Money, you can definitely kiss her in public. Dollars work as a key to unlock public expression of love.

5. Most educated Zambian women don’t have time for dating. They are too busy with their careers. If you date one, just give her a Baby. That’s what she wants. She’s not interested in marriage.

6. Most of them consume a lot of alcohol so don’t be surprised when you take her out to Dinner or to any social engagement.

7. You can not go straight to the wedding ceremony. First, she wants an Engagement Party, Kitchen Party, “Chilanga Mulilo,” then Wedding Ceremony. The engagement ring is not important to her. Just give her a lot of money to do a big Kitchen Party.

8. Most of them do not know how to cook. They grow up in homes with Maids. The Maids do all the cooking. So if you’re Italian or Greek and you’re used to big dinners your mother used to cook, you better get used to eating out in Restaurants.

9. When having sex, they wiggle their waists; they can even lift you up. If you are not comfortable with it, you can tell her. She may do that to want to impress you, but let her know if you don’t enjoy it. I don’t enjoy it, so I tell them.

10. When dating a Zambian Woman, always please her friends and the people in her life. You will notice that even her brother who does not have a job gets too close to you. That’s how it is. You don’t date just your girlfriend in Zambia, you date the whole village. Give money to everyone you come to know through her. They are expecting it. Otherwise, your relationship may not last for a long time.

11. If you prefer Dating older women, go for Widows. They are usually calm and down to earth. Look out for Toyota RAV 4s. That’s a car for Widows.

DO NOT go for Divorced women. Most Divorced Zambian women are bitter and angry. Most of them join Women related NGOs. They use it as a conduit to express their anger for men. They hate men. Period!

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36 COMMENTS

  1. Ladies, could you please respond to this article?? Are these 11 characteristics an accurate reflection of the majority of you? For example, do you booze a lot? (I personally know you do!!!). If thes characteristics mentioned in this article are a true reflection of the majority of you, our dear ladies, can we therefore say you’re ready for marriage (just a good stable marriage based on mutual respect….love…and where you play your traditional role as a woman, etc)????????. REMEMBER, this article is not about men (we have our own issues as men as well). So let’s stick to the subject, women!!

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    • What a pathetically written article. It reads like it was written by a loser with a very limited pool of Zambian girls to pick from!

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    • “There are a few things to consider before you date a Zambian girl…That’s right, girl! Perhaps when you yourself start dating women not girls, then you can write about that!

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    • They will bring 2 or 3 friends to a date and expect you to pay they bill…..and they never, never pay for anything when you go out, you are their Blesser!!

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  2. This boy can not even write an essay and he expects people to read his rubbish…go back to school.
    This is for the Dutch boys who go to Livingston to pick up those Zambian women …you will find them in Holland married to old men.

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  3. flag Alternative Facts Fake News S**thole Countries Social Mobility Chinese Zambia Police Reservists Corruption scandals: Ambulances Fire Trucks Mukula Trees Ndola-Lusaka Rd Malawi Maizegate Fuelgate Swaziland landgate Zesco Loans

    What a load of bull manure! Apparently this is a rebuttal to @Nubian Queen’s article the other day. Nice try but you both fell shot.

    Please stop using 400 BC stone-age period stereotype labels on an entire population for your self, narrow self-aggrandizement.

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  4. Think big mwana you die poor ,spend your energy on things that will build you and who ever your target group don’t be shallow and narrow minded please for once our ladies are not that cheap as you trying to portray them or may be you ve been dating amaule and that has become a standard for our girls to think big think big

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  5. Married for 10 years to a Zambian lady.I think Peri is lost in his article,or he got involned with a very low class person.Zambian women is hardworking,respectfull,honest,sober and trustworvey.All over thr World you find good abd bad,dont judge the as bad,the final choice is yours.

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  6. They don’t know how to cook, consume a lot of ????, they don’t know flowers, just want money, money and money, if you have a big Ranger Rover, you can even date the daughter of the president…
    materialistic, alcoholic, amaule . What a befitting description… This is not an insult , facts are there for everyone to prove this. Change your foul habits , you are Filthy ,be classic , self reliant, content and industrious. Learn manners , You are a big let down to Zambia. It’s because of you we now branded the most drunk nation on Earth.

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    • I bet you wouldn’t say that within an arm’s length of your mother without getting slapped hard across your cheek..you are responding to a small boy who thinks he is posting on his Facebook page as he doesn’t know the difference and he is too lazy to write up a proper essay.

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    • I wonder what kind of church girls he was describing, I wonder if he knows what buying flowers, going for dinner means, am sure he had a terrible relationship experiences with his girls. Just because the boss gave him a car to use he thought he was on top of the world, am sure he was sent to get something and he ended up feeling himself around so he could be seen.

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  7. First of all,I don’t know which ditch you came from.But you can take that ridiculous opinion somewhere else.Your so uncivilized,take your trashy mindset back to your butt where it came from,because this article is clearly Bull.

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  8. This is rubbish and nonsense article.Who told this foolish white man that we are so poor and desperate for filth intimacy with white guys who don’t even brush their teeth or have no teeth at all.Abasungu the are all liars including men.No wander most of them cannot different between a man and a woman .They are the chaps that bring incurable diseases to our disparate sisters who want instant luxiorous life.My sisters that live in the western world know more about these *****s.Let them tackle the brexit issue as soon prostitutes from Eastern Europe will run to favourable economies in mainland Europe due to the drastic fall of the pound.Iurge the Zambian media to be very careful they way they write stories about Zambia.Even us Africans in the diaspora cannot write about the weakness or what…

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  9. or what they white girls have seen in black men.This is supposed to be his consumption and experience in Africa.It is not only Africa were these bugas go to experiment their dirty love work.They write the same on countries they have sexually exploited in Asia like Thailand and Vietnam and write and shoot films on local women their.Definately one Zambian fool might have told and briefed this ***** about our girls.Lastly Iurge our Zambian girls to be very careful as some of these men are able to transmit fatal illnesses like Hepatitis B&C .The choice is there’s as not all that gitters is gold.

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  10. Wow am lost of words,made me laugh a bit.not every woman is like that,there are some but not everyone

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  11. Sounds like it wa written by a frustrated broke Zambian man who has been rejected (hence the frustration expressed in the article).

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  12. This is a the most stupid article i have ever seen in my life & i can tell that Its from a person who certainly only got exposed to our caucasaian friends in adult life and he thinks Its the same for everyone.
    Excuse you but Its not so for everyone. Some of us grew up with them and we still happen to be Zambian. I guess you can not handle late exposure late exposure but please get your facts right before you showcase your stupidity.

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  13. this sounds like a piece written by a bitter person who got their heart broken …… every country and place has various kinds of women……..if your love life hasnt been all that ,that is not reason to slum zambian women…… please get perspective and grow up .

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  14. I am a Zambian by birth but didn’t grow up in the county. however, I’ve been back in country for a while now as an adult and never really understood some of the behavioral traits of Zambian women tbh and I just gave up altogether on trying so i came to this article to perhaps understand better.

    Now as much as most of it is indeed ‘stereotype’ as are all things that come in an umbrella opinion i must admit that most of it is in fact true and it is because of that that most people will be against it as it does expose some embarrassing truths and honestly no one if not few humans can take rebuke well.

    I think it’s up to the individual to do an introspection and see where their shortcomings are in these brackets and perhaps improve where possible. In as much as the article is…

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