Tuesday, June 18, 2024

Killing Economic hardships? Pinocchio Will Fix It!


By Kapya kaoma

If you’re wondering why I stopped writing about HH’s Dark Regime, it’s not that I am promised a job like Pilato. To some extent, you realize that only a mad person would perpetually cover Pinocchio. So is the King of truth, his Excellency the Pinocchio of Zambia.

As I said before, one can lie to the position of the world class soccer coach, but the truth is on the field. So is Zambia’s Pinocchio, his nose is too long, and his pants are on fire as his name is ridiculously disparaged by the kids, the youth, the aged and the mentally insane in villages, on the streets, in bars, and worse, on social media! Is it not time to mourn? Fallen! Fallen is Bally the Pinocchio! HH has become a name for demons and Bally a title for every bad thing, a haunt for every unclean and detestable thing in Zambia. I just paraphrased Revelation 18:2, but sadly, these words apply to the man whose election was heralded as victory for the masses just a year ago!

Lying and arrogance are HH’s biggest enemies. His lies are now catching up on him. Like his cadres, Councilors, MPs and Ministers, he finds solace in foreign lands. In fact, he regrets not moving into Plot One. His trip from New Kasama is now endless. Masses hurl insults on him for his lies, while others ignore him like a skunk.

I said it just after HH won the election–the guy in white gloves had nothing to offer to Zambians save lies. Then, “Bally Will Fix It” was the Social Media Profile Brand. Countless women claimed to be in love with “this man” (Bally), and when I questioned his integrity, l was showered with insults!

I didn’t denounce Lungu or the PF to beg for a job from a cartel whose business dealings remain veiled in masonic secrecy. I strongly believe Zambia is much more important than my happiness; so when calls to give HH time bellowed from academics and civil society leaders, I called HH for what he is–a heartless egocentric maniac whose only intent is to enrich himself at the expense of Zambians. The poor he doesn’t see, and governance he doesn’t know save self-praise and taking pictures with white people.

I forcefully responded to HH’s diagnosis of Zambia’s problems when he sat and smiled at the UN as President Joe Biden insulted Zambia to the global audience. The depreciation of the Kwacha; load shedding; lack of drugs; shortages and high prices of fertilizers and ubunga, Lungu and his cronies are behind the mess. In other words, the high cost of living he cannot fix because of Lungu and the PF. Only stupidity would make one believe HH’s argument sells to the hungry mouth. But what happened to the “Bally Will Fix It” mantra on which he ran? Is it not fair for the UPND to say, Pinocchio Will Fix It?

Come rain, come thunder, the utopian version of development that he promised won’t happen under his chipante pante administration. HH doesn’t possess the leadership qualities needed to strategically develop the nation. From his cabinet to his foreign service, HH has shown lack of judgment. What qualifies Pilato to be Permanent Secretary? Kaya!

To him development only happens with foreign MOUs. This neocolonial capitalist mentality is behind his erratic contracting of foreign debts. Borrowing to hire civil servants (nurses and teachers) is not job creation at all–this sector is service delivery. People don’t pay to access the services rendered by these workers. In addition, these workers would be on payroll beyond the age of the loan; implying that we will be paying the loans and paying the workers without creating revenue from the loan contracted. This is the danger of ideological programs.

HH should have begun by constructing civil servants’ houses across the country. Here, both the CDF, and the IMF/WB loans would have been used to ensure new houses are built across the country–creating countless jobs for unemployed people, businesses for small companies and uplifting local communities from poverty. Once those houses were completed, then employ teachers and nurses, and ask them to pay rent. In this regard, the loans would have a payment plan in place–something Parliament should be putting in place for any loan contracted. Another reason development policy should not be the President’s personal business–non political career-oriented civil servants must direct government policy since national development outlives the President in power.

Sadly, by playing prostitute with the IMF/World Bank, Bally fixed Zambia. As I said in 2021, I say it again, tighten your belts for harder days ahead. Pinocchio won’t be Jesus, the Kwacha must be devalued while wages must remain low. It is investors first, Zambians later! The MOUs will be plentiful, but the demons are in HH’s heart. Please don’t trust the pictures from heartless Pinocchio.

Pinocchio will always be Pinocchio!


  1. Pinocchio will fark everything up

    There isn’t a better feeling than making love to your own wlfe. I don’t understand why anyone would choose to cheat on their personal baby.

    Upnd you are making it hard for us to sleep with our wlves. How can you make love in the dark. We appreciate that your upnd wlves are ugly so darkness benefits you. Should we be thankful for reduced load shedding? Fuseke barfikarla

  2. Oh dear, can we have men in white coats to take this man away to chainama. He has lost his marbles!
    There is enough material for an entire conference on psychiatry!

  3. Vintage Kapya Kaoma. It’s his only way of communicating. His aim in this piece was to disparage and not to dialogue and he has succeeded like success.

  4. This eternal tribalist… don’t worry your uncle Lungu will never bounce back to power, ever.. you are just too angry that a Tonga man you kept on preaching will never rule Zambia is now the president… so what are u gonna do?

  5. Welcome back Kapya and great writeup. It’s clear BMW is taking us nowhere. I know most politicians are known for lying but uyu ena achita over, does it shamelessly with a straight face. I think it’s an insult to the intelligences of the masses, probably bar the praise singers who probably know for sure that ifintu tafilemoneka bwino, but they continue to sing not realizing that now baleimba ichileya.

  6. The writer stands above all hyenas who just make noise and run away when the current incompetent and self praise autocratic regime coughs. Most, if not all points raised by Kapya are factual. We are dealing with a very selfish, conman, egocentric a know it all.

  7. Thought Kapya Kaoma had died with Covid-19 – His quietness suggested so, and peace of civility prevailed except for KZ demon. Kapya Kaoma is as ugly as his mouth spewing vile of hate for the republican president. “There is a way which seemeth right unto a man, But the end thereof, are ways of destruction and death”. Examine your route of expression, if its building or leading to self destruction.

  8. Inspector G: Get me some handcuffs this Kapya is saying exactly what that Evelyn Hone Driver said about my Bally!
    Chief Constable: We cant lock him up bwana. Your Bally cancelled criminal defamation
    Inspector G: Under part 3 of the penal code we can still charge him. Lets use chapter 8 of the penal code and charge this Kapya guy
    We can even use the cyber crime act of 2021 to charge him with hate speech.
    Chief Constable: Ok sir lets ask him to bring himself to Police HQ

  9. No.mstter how hard am trying to defend upnd these days,it’s becoming harder and harder.I simply can’t see the light at the end of the tunnel.
    It’s bad and going worse.From bad or relations on part of the upnd gvt to harsh evomic and health woes Zambians are going thru,one can deduce that we were much better in visionless lungu’s govt than upnd.
    Up d work up tell ur president the truth.

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