Saturday, February 24, 2024

Respected Evangelical Pastors Love Pinocchio: Amen! HH’s Nose Can’t Grow Endlessly


By Kapya Kaoma.

Respected Evangelical Pastors Love Pinocchio: Amen! HH’s Nose Can’t Grow Endlessly

Imagine a scenario in which Pinocchio lies without end and his nose continues to extend. Hypothetically, Pinocchio could. In reality, however, his lies must have limits or else his nose would not only make him look so ugly, but become too heavy a load for him to carry, and to see where he is going. So is His Excellency, the Republican Pinocchio. With his thousands of lies, Mr. HICHILEMA has undressed himself to a kid as to every woman–naked our President parades himself amongst those who know the emperor has no clothes.

He doesn’t know what lie he just told yesterday. With Grade 12 results just out, his automatic bursaries won’t kick in for every poor child–well he didn’t promise it. Giving bursaries to everyone was the first thing Pinocchio promised to do once he came into power.

It seems Zambians are confusing Pinocchio with HH–the two are not the same. Pinocchio told the nation that load shedding and fertilizer distribution were under control, but HH didn’t. President Hichilema tells the truth–calling him Pinocchio is dishonorable. The problem is HH does not speak or tweet–only Pinocchio does. Under his leadership, we have normalized indecency and buried shame. A man can lie and lie and lie and lie, and pastors and criminals alike defend him like a saint.

In my college days, my roommate Pastor Isaac Makashinyi came up with the term “Chief Denier,” for then President Chiluba’s Spokesman Sakala. But Sakala’s lies couldn’t compare to Anthony Bwalya’s–the man lied until he couldn’t remember his next lie. Yet reasonable pastors were completely in for HH. And who can bite the very hand that feeds it?

But how would they look their children in the face and pretend they don’t have ears? How do they teach them the honor of truth telling at all costs unless when they refuse to accept what HH said just yesterday? The Pinocchio culture adopted by HH supporting respectable Evangelical pastors cannot be normalized–it is evil and shameful. Truth matters!

Nobody forces HH to make promises. If they don’t hold him accountable for the promises of yesterday, why should people trust him for the promises of tomorrow? Beloved Pinocchio cannot be entrusted with signing MOUs on behalf of the nation—it is betrayal of the citizens!

Self-praise is his entitlement, but not alternative facts. Didn’t he ask for 90 days, and then 6 months to fulfill his promises? A year, most people said, and now, we are moving into the second year. Today, we are being promised to wait until 2 or perhaps 4 more years. Sadly, the UPND would have been out of power by then!

The truth is, our president lied to us during the campaign and he is still lying to us. This is not debatable–it doesn’t matter if you voted for him or not–the truth is that the Zambia he promised and the Zambia he is presiding over are not the same. You can rationalize it the way you want, but the truth remains–fertilizer is not cheap or abundant, load shedding is not over, the cost of living is going up, unemployment is not lower, University Education is not free, cadres still exist, human rights violations are rampant, name it! Worse, we have entered a phase that nobody even HH himself ever anticipated–shortages of ubunga and the price hitting above K200! While UPND officials cannot explain the reasons for this shameful state, the truth is the President’s lies are catching up with him–the last farming season disaster is behind this mess. The worst is still to come given the ongoing crisis with this year’s farming season disaster. We are just in January.

What’s the solution! It could be the PF! After all, it could be sabotage from the opposition, so the UPND deputy GS told the nation. Some are courageous enough to admit it, they just don’t know why this mess. But their cadres are too wise to know–they are foolishly claiming to be ready to pay K1000 for a 25kg bag of mealie meal to keep Pinocchio in power!

No wonder Pinocchio’s pastors have long noses too–they are allergic to the truth!


  1. The writer’s reminders are apt. HH ascended to Plot One or Community House commercialized as Plot One, using lies and he continues telling more lies whilst in power. We could forgive him that whilst in opposition the man didn’t know his left from the right, but now he’s aware of all the hidden truths since he’s in charge. Why not amending his lies into truth? The days ahead are full of complexities and we must brace for ourselves.

    • Tell us about the lies of paying retirees, employing teachers and health workers, and reducing caderism at bus stops and markets. What about free education?
      The rest will be fulfilled because the mandate was 5 years not 1 year. Oh let’s not forget the freedom of speech and association.
      So tell the lies he is not dealing with which should have been dealt with in 12 months?

  2. Unfortunately, Reverend, politics is like religion. Both make promises. The only difference is that for religion, time and the unknown beyond death is on its side. Politicians make promises and so do religions. Politicians have to make good their promises in the timeframe that has been mandated. Religion can say whatever it wants becuase no one will come back from the dead to confirm that they did have 40 v1rg1ns or that there were streets paved with gold. The point I want to make is that everyone is taken by faith. You vote for a politician believing that they weill do what they promised. At the next election, you judge.

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