Dear LT bloggers,
I had a daughter out of wedlock born in 1996. I intended to marry the mother of my daughter but things could not work out as her parents could not allow her to marry someone from a different tribe.
I was charged damages which I paid in full. I took care of all my child’s financial responsibilities and shared custody of the child until 2002 when the mother got married to a fellow Tonga and moved to South Africa. Since then, I have not been allowed to support or even see my own daughter. I am also reliably informed that even her names have been changed. I have been very depressed at the situation as I don’t think it’s a fair deal.
Please, advise me on how I can get custody of my daughter. I have a good job, am well settled and I have a wonderful family. However, my conscious cannot let me be without my only child.
Depressed… Zambian  man.
Having a good job is not the thing all you need is your child whether poor or not as long as you are capable of taking care bt nt marrying off.Try to involve the embassy if it can assist in locating your daughter or travel to south if you have info about where they are staying.
Its really sad at this level even names have been changed seek legal advice though not sure may be you were not responsible very much hence she decided to forget about you
Ka baby c come on what good man he must be a jocker because you seem u insult men.
Rubbish,am Tonga almost every tribe in Zambia is married to atleast one of my relatives without discrimination.There must be something wrong with you not tribe.Check yourself
Going by what you have written, you have every right to see your child. You have known this woman and her relatives for so long. They should tell you where she is and then you could seek legal advice. However, it is difficult to comment on one sided story.
Dont trust Hakainde Hichilema,not only will they take the wealth of the country but also your family belongings.There after they will take your daughters,these tonga guyz are very very cruel.when it comes to tribalism i would prefer a tribalist from eastern province atleastb they dont have false courage.Hichilema stands for tribalism and he is a product of that.These tonga chaps even started campainging before even Levy Mwanawansa passed away.upnd is filled with evil.Zambians lets be careful with these tonga people
seek legal advice..
the woman has not forgotten about u,am sure she feels just as bad,however ,she may have done it to protect her marriage,
keeping in touch with you would have caused problems.
all u do is find her relatives who should tel u were she is, find her and talk about it, u can proceed with the legal action after hearing from her.
this story sounds fishy….but we give you the BOD (benefit of doubt) seek legal advice be a man and stop getting depressed eish!
#3.bms9 why do you hate me? Which insults are you refering to? sorry if i did.
too bad for you..hope you realy took care of your daughter not this common of men letting their childred in the street.Its very UNUSUAL/RARE INDEED among tongas to have street children.be a responsible father next time boy !!!
too bad my dear some women would rather protect there marriages than please anyone even thier own blood.Be carefull with us women we can be bad news at times.But dont worry blood is thicker than water your baby will know the truth oneday and will look for sweet daddy!gudluck
My friend you made a mistake by not solving your problem earlier on ,just support your daughter financially at the moment she is used to the people she is staying with , after she is grown up she will be able decide on her own whom to stay with , this thing of going to the courts well just disturb her mentally.
Choma1…! Look at you! first thing that comes to your mind is…tonga this tonga that! look at yourself before you say all those things…!
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# 1 He mentioned the fact that he has a good job AND is well settled to indicate that he is able to look after the child, so poverty can’t be used as an excuse. Not that he’s rich or whatever. Understand before posting, please.
Ewe ci choma1 ububi noku nuka mukanwa aga tribalism iyo uleleta apa. We trying to help our brother with some piece of advice and you come yapping some cheap rubbish here of tribalism, grow up iwe.Uli mbale sana mwaice iwe.Bakufyelile pa mpanga mwaice.
choma1 WTF????? wht drugs are you taking…..go to hell
#6 Choma1,
You are talking nosense. This is a common marital situation and has nothing to do with tribe, let alone HH. Just get lost…
Baby c i wanted to wake you up coz you are too quiet today.
chez but what do you feel about this man.
Do not lose your focus because of this woman who has stollen your child. Blood is thicker than water. One day she will come looking for you, no matter how long it takes. Stay blessed.
Tongas will always be inferior thats why they cant have a paramount chief despite them having spent all their lives trying to do that.After failing that they might have sat down there ku malende ku goonde to try to come up with a president and this is evident in everybody s eyes,it even took the Late President to give u a tonga Southern Province Minister because your chiefs were making issues .Failure after failure,change ur path guyz am for national unity
hahaaaaa….! # 6 & 15 you need serious prayers & fasting.try get to church for deliverance.evil minded chaps.BUT FOR NOW GOD SPARE YOU so that you can cast your votes.VIVA RP
Hello there
I dont know about the laws regarding children registration and so own but i am of the opinion that to have the names changed it would require concert from both parents throuh the court as long as at you name is there as father. Besically i think legally the child is still your responsibility if you are ok with the name change you should still have parental rights to see and be with the child. You where not married to the woman and a lot of times the law favours the mother thats something you will need to take into consideration should you wish to take legal action.
Tongas can be trible we all know it, but that won’t help. This is what U shld do: Give out the full names of your babymamy and her husband and Ur contact info, someone in S.A. will know them; check with the embassy; seek legal advice. Not necessarily in that order but this shld help.
MR ZAMBIAN MAN DONT BE DEPRESSED,COZ ACCORDING TO YOUR WORDS SOMEONE CAN NOTE THAT YOU RUN AWAY FROM YOUR RESPONSIBILITIES.NO.1 YOU WERE NOT SETTLED AND DID’NT ‘VE A GOOD JOB.GO 2 YOUR INLAWS AND SEEK FORGIVENESS OR ELSE YOUR CONSCIOUSNESS WILL NOT LET YOU TILL DEATH WITHOUT YOU TRACING YO DAUGHTER.
Sorry to hear that my friend…get yourself a good lawyer to help you sort out this mess of yours..those chaps have no right to keep you from your daughter…as for them changing her names, i doubt they can do that without your consent considering that you are also the kids parent…so my friend, get that lawyer..
the truth hate, tongas en lozis are triblists, thus y i will marry one of them to prove this
This has nothing to do with the woman being Tonga. pipo don’t be so small minded by running away from the issue at hand. It is a trick used by small minded pipo to avoid an issue by attacking the person. In Logic they call it ‘argumentum ad hominem’ (attacking the well because you don’t like the water coming from it). It reveals nothing about the person you are attacking but a lot about your reasoning capabilities – or lack of them!!
There is too much crap on this forum. Sounds like there are some NAZI, HUTU extremists.
I have nothing against a lozi marrying a lozi,Lozis are a special breed and that breed is suppoesed to be preserved by avoiding intermarriages.
Shame on all you who are preaching tribalising. what is tribal about 1+1? If you think you are superior, lets arrange we meet and sort each other physically and we continue this fight even to our children.
Seems to me that you probably were not intouch with your baby mama and only want to get involved now. If that is the case then, she had the right to change the name because she didn’t know where you were. Get in touch with her relatives and things will pick up from there. Like everyone else has said, the child will one day want to know you. Please avoid legal action – sort it out with family first!
Ndimwe mafuntixs…………
Why all the this diplomancy?call a spade a spade,this is tribalism at work.HH cant be trusted,this is an insight of things at hand.Not every tribe can be trusted with national issues.
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bms9 missing me haaa!
Looks like the man has given us a half baked story. My advice is, let him sit down with the girls family to see the way forward.
This story is one sided
i suspct the man hit the road and now hes getting to realise,,to late mwisho
LT management you have some tribalism rooted against Tonga people. I have noticed that usually your embarassing stories from rural areas feature Sinazongwe, Mazabuka and Tonga land. Today’s tribal story just had to include a fellow Tonga man. The issue you are reporting today is Tonga tribalism and you have craftily hidden it in getting custody of a daughter. How can you found your website on tribal lines. Then you also have no ethics as unbiased journalists. If you can please answer do you have any Tonga people in your company?
any way guyz wako ni wako. its sad for this guy and dont run away from the truth there is triblism in Zed. how many mps do we have from southern who are not UPND?
hahahahaha PROPAGANDA I can not belive LT has posted this stupid story for the sake of discrediting us Tonga Bulls… Are you guys crazy… Tonga Bulls Stand Up, this is why i am here to make sure people do not take advantage of the Tongas…. HH is the target of this story. LT is tribal, they could have left out the tribal origin of the girl. Tonga Bulls do not despair, STAND UP STRONG
I DONT BELIEVE YOU, YOU MUST HAVE TREATED THE MOTHER BADLY WHEN SHE WAS PREGNANT ,MAYBE YOU EVEN REFUSED RESPONSIBILITY,NOW AFTER THE CHILD HAS GROWN UP, YOU WANT TO TELL A DIFFERENT STORY. SORRRRIOOOOH, UNLESS WE GET THE STORY FROM A LADY AS WELL,THATS WHEN WE WILL SUPPORT YOU. ITS COMMON GUYS REFUSE RESPONSIBILITY IN THE EARLY CHILD CUSTODY,WHEN THE CHILD GROWS UP ELYO BALA CLAIMER.
Didn’t let you marry the girl on tribal lines? In this day and age? COME ON! Did you question her on who else could possibly have been responsible? Going to the extent of changing the child’s name is extreme and certainly points to that scenario.
Sounds to me like you now don’t have a child in your new setup and want to get back the lost daughter. I also doubt that you supported this child financially but if you can prove it then seek legal redress otherwise you do not have much of a case in getting a child that young from its mother unless you can prove its in her best interest. Wait for her to decide on her own and continue with the alleged support.
Since indepedence, there always have been a someone representing the eastern province in state house; either president from eastern province or his wife. kaunda was easterner, vera chiluba is easterner, vice president banda is easterner, acting president banda, easterner, INCOMING PRESIDENT must,should and will be easterner. 3 wise men were from the east. bembas are miners, Tongas cattle herders, lozis are fishermen, they all can’t live in state house. SERIOUSLY!!
No. 6 choma1 you are of the old generation. By the way what level of education did you attain. Why are you always threatened with tongas. I think this tribe must be doing fine in Zed because each time it is mentioned, people feel uncomfortable. Work hard choma1 may be one day you will be like tongas.
Are you sure this is your daughter? Maybe he is the real dad……
Since when has HH started watching soccer?he was at the stadium yesterday watching only one player,guess you know which player he was watching.Yes some tongas have realised they dont have what it takes to be President or just to have a paramount chief hence the need to import people from other tribes and change their names?but my question is why panick?why being in hurry.I know SDA their church has always had been preaching that the world is coming to an end in 2000,but this never happened.Rememember how they used to treat our late President at their ceremonies?evil,disrespectiful and cruelty
If only this man can tell us the truth, this issue has got nothing to do with tribes, to me its like this man was no resiposible or had denid the pregnacy of which it happens many guys out there regadless which part of zambia the person comes from. lets not single out tribes.
Clever girl.
Now why didnt I think of that instead of fighting to get support from a part-time “when I am good and ready” biological father.
Don’t mean to boast but I’m Tonga myself and I know what I’m talking about.
I dont know how you can get your daughter, but I would like to believe entering a discussion with the family may be very important.
Now, do you want to get your daughter or just to be able to be seing her?
Because you are not the only parent, you are not the only owner of the child, so ‘getting’ may not be accepted by the family of the mother.
A child will always belong to 2 families, so what you need id to negotiated for access to the child. Of course you dont expect them to clap for you if you say you want to get the child.
I wish i could be a tonga, very hard working ,obedient women and not thieves
Choma 1 you sure have a sick and twisted mind. Do us all a favour and spare us the horror of peeping into your sick mind!
SO SAYS THE READER.
its normal to speak bemba and nyanja in lsk,but wrong to speak lozi or tonga with all kind of tags behind your back,,,am not tonga by the way but i hate it wen people call tongas and lozis tribalists
Why did you not marry her in 1996 when you impregnated her? She waited for 8 years and now that she is gone you complain about it. There should be something that you are not telling us, be frank.
a woman cannot just decide to take away a child like that from the father whos been very supportive without telling the father. There are three things here:
1. this has nothing to do with the tribe
2. you have not been supporting the child hence her decision not to tell you
3. you doubted that you are not the father
WhAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT I HAVE BEEN A VICTIM OF THE SAME NONESENSE TO AN EXTENT OF MY WIFES RELATIVES WANTING TO NAME MY FIRST CHILD. bREAK THE F..KING TRIBE BARRIER. CANT EVEN WALK NAKED IN MY HOME AS HER RELATIVE ARE ALWAYS VISITING AND DESTROYING. sHE IS EVIL THAT GIRL.
If she is your child she will come to you
Dear depressed Zambian man, to me you sound like a very disorganised and irresponsible fellow who failed to take care of a woman you impregnated and you are now feeling guilty because she has been married to a responsible man who has even adopted your child. Unfortunately he is Tonga, anyway he could be Tonga from Malawi so no tribalism involved but ethinic maybe.
You dull #6, whats wrong with your brain cells.
#58. Mpanda,
There is nothing wrong for your wife’s parents to name your child as long as you agree they do it.
But since did not agree and they did not name your child I guess, did they do so?
I they wanted to name the child and you as a father you said no, and they respected that, that is normal; there is nothing wrong with that, man!
And for visiting, there is nothing wrong with them visiting you. Why do you think they are wrong? Unless you burn them and you reach an agreement, they agree. Otherwise as long as you have their daughter, they are entitled my friend, take not of that.
The Story has a lot of gaps.
Whatever it is. The man has the right to seek legal redress. The man has to prove that, this child is his by DNA, he has also to prove that he supported the child for the period mentioned and state under the conditions he lost custody or contact. Between 2002 to date is 6 years. It is possible, this is the period in which this man went AWOL.
The generous Tonga-man could actually be doing this irresponsible Easterner a favor by growing his child.
very few men can look after other people’s children.Thats why you see those Streets Kids in Lusaka.. Read between the lines.
man you guys on this forum make my day, i doubt i can be sad for an entire day, kuli ba fwaka pano
iwe just have another one or go and adopt one kukabwata ophanage
#63 have courage.you are behaving like a real tribalist,no courage.ko amba mwami .ku yasa yasa,nzala mu chibono
If this is not a hypothetical story, I find it difficult to accept the fact that he could not be allowed to marry the lady on tribal lines. there is something missing from this story.
However if the imformation disclosed is true then i advise the man to seek legal advice.
Choma1 I can read between lines. You are out to get the Tongas and to me you sound like a Tonga actually. In this day and age, people can marry whoever they want be it orange, red or black or marry each each (same tribe)no problem about that. Just enjoy life.
#68 I have ivory on my arm and that speaks volumes about my identity.We are discussing national issues here and not personalities,I got not time for that.
A woman is regarded as not properly married if she marries a man of another tribe or race.—–Quote, Bemba Customs and Genealogy.
This does not mean, it is not allowed or acceptable.
I am sure this applies to many other Languages existing in Zambia.
The preferences of who to marry extends way back to time started existing and it is now that, these barriers are being broken.
Some of you people here pretend that Zambia has reached such an advanced stage in its quest for ‘modernization’. There are still a large number of ‘parents’ born between 1920’s and 1960 who still beleive that their tribe is everything and marrying someone from another tribe is an abomination. Don’t even try to mention interracial marriages (unless they subscribe to the idea that its a ‘status symbol’). While the ideal is not to have any prejudices, the reality is that such vices still exist. It just depends on the individual family and how ‘traditional’ they are. Don’t use blanket statements. If in the cities, mixed couples are stared at…what more in rural areas? Were still a long way off.
You are not the father! for your peace of mind take a dna test!
HK has come up out in open,people have called me names but i ask others to consult wider.Speaking the truth does not make one bad.I salute you HK sad I had to smoke you out of that hole.The fact you came out deserves you respect
This child is not yours .This woman cheated you.The man she married is the biological father.She thought you would marry her if she said you impregnated her.Grow up my man.Fyala kumu kashi wobe kaili.Are you firing blanks.
Iwe don’t bring fictitious stories to this forum. you are wasting our time! You sound like you have erectile problems with your penis, or may be it is so thin and short that it couldn’t compete well with her Tonga bull, so she naturally chose the proper bull. Go to Soweto market and consult a n’ganga for a PENIS ENLARGEMENT herb…you silly twat! STOP CRYING OVER A SMALL PENIS. IT’S NOT YOUR FAULT!!!
whereever u haters come from zambia is for all whether thieves from the north , tuchawa easterners , fake lozis or herder tongas so get a grip and not discredit others coz of ur inadequecies you are all losers coz if you had it going you would be in zed enjoying the life and not spending time blogging insults on a tribalist fora like lt get a life and credit to the ladies for upholding mwambo and not insulting like the zambian men who we have ignored coz of chilishness viva zambia viva tongas viva everyone
Choma1. Your hate will eat you alive till you drop dead. and envy will send you to hang yourself.
kokoliko walasa boi thats the truth the chap is thinking we are going to sympathise coz he is telling fibbs get ur issues sorted u men are just jealous that tonga bulls get serious chicks coz of their endowed penises and am married to a tonga man he is the one so go to soweto
ITS A COMMON AFRICAN MENTALITY WHERE MEN SIR CHILDREN AND ABANDON THEM, WHEN LIFE GETS TOUGH IN THEIR FUTURE,WHEN THEY FAIL TO HAVE CHILDREN MATRIMONIALLY THEY START CLAIMING FOR CHILDREN THEY ABANDONED AS CAN BE SEEN’MY ONLY CHILD’REMEMBER KAFUPI DID THE SAME UNTIL KAFUPI JNR BECAME HIS EXELLENCY AND AS USUAL U ALL SAW WHAT UN GUIDED LEARNING CAN PRODUCE A THIEF IN ALL AREAS OF HUMAN ENDEAVOUR.
i dont even have tim e to respond to choma 1 coz he will hang himself after reading the comment
Tonga’s are dangerous, those my chick is Tonga also…95% of them tongas are cruel.
#80 Why should I hang? As a Chritian I know onething John the baptist was beheaded for speaking the truth.Tongas have a problem and this tells you why they could not EVEN win a single battle in their life history so which men are you talking about?Men are supposed to protect their families,WIVES and land.Why should people trust hichilema WHEN there is no guaratee that a tonga man can protect his people NOR HIS LAND.
Iwe choma1 when are we getting paid here??
Tonga men even serious problems to deal with bushmen?so what manhood are you talking about?
83 I live in Ukraine anyway
dang the other day i was called Tribal… today the true tribalists are coming out in big numbers… Tonga Bulls Lets defend ourselves.
Bottom line is Tongas are proud people but Northerners Steal and are foul mouthed. Tonga Bulls do not let them talk down who we are. If we can heard cows and all they can do is steal, we are better managers for Plot # 1. We can make the Treasury overflow with prosperity. STAND UP Tonga Bulls.. the time is now
Kmillion has an answer to alot of irresponsible Guyz: True Clours
Choma1. U a bastard of a Tonga bull. Just speak the truth.
#88 HK whats up man?Tongas failed to handle bushmen ,how can you handle international affairs?you have never ruled anywhere in the world,you have never been superiors,you have always been subjects of the Lozi people?Do you go to SDA?Are you aware that the Late President had to appoint daniel munkombwe to satisfy the tonga people because they could not cooperate with ministers from other tribes?
This blog has lost track, hijacked by people without reason, ability to rise above tribal affiliation and a serious inability to focus on the issues at hand. Truthful contribution #71.
This anti-tonga nonsense that has started in Zambia really irritates me. At first you laughed because Tongas are dull and behind. We are near the Capital, have a rail way line and many towns as you head to the tourist capital. We are the most exposed to all! Go to any province and you should be stupid if you laugh at the locals and how behind or illiterate they are. Now tongas are called all sorts of names because HH has done so well. Why the inferiority complex! Its things like these that bring up civil wars… bit by bit and soon we will be burning each other’s homes!
The depressed man… I suspect there is something that you did that made this woman up and leave with your daughter minus a single trace. This would explain why you are depressed and perhaps guilty too. Well, legally you can get her back. I am not sure if it will be the best thing for the child… but it is important for you to see her and you have every right. Good luck and wish you God’s blessings in your endeavour. Anything is possible when you try hard enough. Dont feel hopeless just do whatever it takes and she will be found.
I have a clue to this person called Choma1 and time will reveal very soon.
Wise contribution indeed No.71. i just gave you a thumbs up together
with No.90.
No. 71 i want to marry into your family hmnhmn what do you think?
by the way i wasnt bribing you with the thumbs up, its genuine.
To marry from some tribes i know is very very easy,all you have to do is TO show your UPND card and if you cant find it just show anything green coz the card itself is green
red or green cant remember
LT. I propose that you ban the following for sanity’s sake;
No.81 chipo
No.82 Choma 1
No. 86 that chengelo alu… something.
Dont tell me you cant, unless ba blogela muma kafe.
Aka Mulozi kalanda nakabili.
Choma 1. That’s why you live in Ukraine!!! You are shallow minded. Wachepa amasambililo!!!!
Can some Tonga Bull Claim this prodigal son of their called Choma!. Mulelesuntwe…Kiwena siyangunu ahulu.. I wont sign your meal Card..hehehehehe..Am ambassador In Russis dont forget.
Why does Choma1 hate Tongas so much. An ivory-bungle-wearing person (Lozi) such as Choma1 is supposed to support his mbuyas the Tongas but alas he is doing the opposite. No wonder their chimbuya is not as strong as that of the Bembas and Ngonis. True some Tongas are tribalists but there are also many Lozis who are tribalists if not worse. Ask non-Lozis who work in Western Province and they will tell you how trbalistic Loziz are. So Lozis cannot escape the T tag.
I love tongas we are discussing issues.we have Rupiya as President thats fine.I am coming to vote next my employers have authorised me to travel I am happy.Rupiya for Presidency.I like the man
I like that we can talk about this tribal thing, as it serves to
disipate and maybe vent some ill feelins that others may have about others. However am disappointed that the notion held by many is that only Tongas and lozis are tribal.
For those who missed wise council i recommend you read posting No.71.
i am personaly and officially granting the title ‘BC’ on this distinguished son of the soil.
BC stands for Blog Council. its the highest honour a blogger can get.RC for Chama 1 .. R for rubbish and C .. you know.
PROOUD LOZI IN LSK
In my efforts to bring out the truth I might have offended some people ,please I ask you to find room in your hearts to forgive me as i hold no hatred against any grouping of people or any human being.God created as the same although the communities in which we live in might have an impact on us.Am sorry fellow countrymen,I might meet some of you at the polling station.I retract my sentences and close the matter.I will not contribute further on this topic.Brothers and Sisters find room to forgive me if I at all hurt or offendebded you,it was no intentional.Allegations that I hate tongas have brought miserable pain and regret in my heart.one zambia one nation.
I also take this opportunity to condemn mr sata s calling of Mr Rupiya Banda a tribalistic.such remarks from a states man are really unwarrated
Sorry man. Father more children your if you are still able. Your daughter will be back my son. do not trust women whatever the tribe, race or country of origin.
#102UMUGAZEBO and FAMILY
wayesu,mwana amulena niswalele.
one zambia one nation
Ka Choma 1 wembushiwe. Ifyamitundu uko! Ala. Kabiye uwashe kanika. Ala! Sha!
Number 40.You are right.Have a Tonga 4 a boss and you will see where the triblism is coming from.I dont have anything agaisnt thm that lets be real these pipo are jst in threr own world.Man your blood will oways be yours.Find out where this child is,am sure you will fine her.
NUMBER 86.
keep on dreaming,jst face the fact,triblism is there in the Tonga land,You people should change 4 the better.
I hope the one who posted this on LT is not using it as something to discredit the Tonga tribe.I am not sure whether it is something we need to be talking aboutThese days parents dont make choices for their children on who to marry.I got married to my wife without the approval of her parents 16 years ago but today they are so happy with me and can noyt hope for a better son in law.So man dont blame any body but yourself and your girl friend for the failed relationship
Hi,i think i know your daughter,just give me the mother’s initials for comfirmation.I might help you.
Hau sichaba! kanti mwanaha mo kuba mu Tonga kimulatu? Nimindinya kaufela seyibapalisa mushobo omutuna cwalo. Cwale wena Depressed Zambian kanti umushobo mang’i?
Choma 1 wabula mano!
#113 Cousin you’re wise. Manyukunyuku ba, kitobone wakuta.
Zambians are amazing.Just how good can they be.Raising so much dust were it`s not even due.My brother do what ever you can to find your daughter.I was in a similar situation and the woman was from eastern.am sure RB knows her Haha.but what ever the case.Individuals can`t be judged based on tirbe.whatever mistakes one makes should be blamed on that individual.anyone can error in any language or tribe.so zambians stick to issues please.good luck mwana,may the good lord unite you one day.
There is a difference between a father and a Dad. Once u identify who or what u want to be is key. Most people dont realise that a DAD and FATHER are two different persons?? Most fathers are JUST parents while DADs are both parents and fathers. A man should take responsibility from the beginning.I commend u if u really did took financial duties-however were u there physically for the child from 1996? I am talking spending time with your child? remembering birthdays, saying I love & protect u? saying good night or maybe tucking her in bed? What I think happened is-u just sent money to the mother, u were married and didnt tell your wife-u shud have used a Condom! What r u? A Dad or Father??
I forgot to drop the mic on the floor…
We have only heard your side of the story what’s hers? Things like this happen everytime. This time it is a woman taking a daughter away, sometimes it happens the other way round the person doesnt have to be Tonga to do that. My brother dont worry just get yourself another good woman and have many daughters. Your daughter will find you whatever happens, blood is thicker than water, unless that daughter was some other man’s baby. Do the search yourself nothing is impossible. Good luck and God bless you.
Definitely seek legal advice. Referral: Muna Sikaulu
If you need to locate your little one I can help, send me info to [email protected]…got good connections and been here 15yrs… just hope you telling the truth, but anyway this is a common problem… good luck…
This is some bul#@t right here. Shut up if you have nothing to say ok. Take good care of women and they will marry you. Just because you failed, you want to disgrace Tonga’s, ulichiyanga.
Well, man, you snooze one time you lose a child big time, tolu uleke iwe! Its like aMwanza ku Malawi, by the time he arose from his slumber, his baby was woth the material girl Madonna in London. Be glad though you did not marry this girl because knowing their ‘kaca’, one would not be very keen on marrying a woman with the same moral behaviour as Vernon Mwaanga.
Dear father, I think your complaint is not complete.If shes Tonga What tribe are you? What makes you think we are interested in knowing her tribe and not yours?and if you think this problem has much to do with her tribe, why did you decide to go-out and have a child with her?You sound to be a wrong chap.If you supported your daughter up to the age of 8yrs.what makes you think your daughter(if she s yours)doesn’t know you the father? If you even know the mother’s name(yo…) why can’t you find your daughter?You even know that they changed her name,so you should know her new name.Don’t waste time writting tosh go and get your daughter or she will find you when she grows up. Hope it will not be
All them Nazi and Hutu Zambians go for some check up at UTH cos as i see it,there might be something wrong with your brain cells or you just still living in the ice age era.You people that will vote for people like Sata cos all the man is up to is tribalism.Go to school or some place where the above/Nazi and Hutus belong.
.too late. regardless of your age i thik you are an irresponsible father. You are the people who go round claimaing children when they achieve high standards in life.Can you tell us who you are maybe we can help you Mann! Never waste your energy,life and blood bearing children with women who you are not married to. stick to your wife. okey? ope this is not too much for you bt its out of brotherly love that i tell you this. Stop bringing Tribal issues, you are the pipo who retard the growth of our contry. Mix with others you will learn alot. Don’t be dormant the next thing you will find is that your name has also been changed.A good job? Thats not important for us to know.Takcare of your wife
It´s a pity that in 2008,in Zambia we still have people thinking about tribal issues when we have got alot to talk about our national issues.What tribe is this irrespossible father?
how can HH rule when tribalism has already started before he is in plot 1? he does not qualify,he will just activate this nonsense of tribalism.everyone knows that a tonga is the most tribalistic person in zed and they need help and prayers. a wrong thing will always be wrong.back to this topic 1.maybe you are not the biological father she only wanted to gain from you but you did not offer a lot. (2) what belongs to you will never run away,if thats your child will remain yours.Thank God you have shown care.
I live in SA and can help you steal the child back to Zed……at a fee of course. just get me the details on where she is staying and going to skool and its a done deal!
That is a long time in which you have not seen your child. You and her essentially have no bond as far as the child is concerned, your role in her life was that of a sperm donor. I doubt there is anything you can legally do to challenge the status quo and even if you did have legal options, would your presence add any value to the child’s life? She has lived half her life without you. Your best chance is after she becomes an adult and wants to reconnect with you. Some things cannot be fixed and this is a perfect example of those things. To all you guys out there, do mind where you stick it cuz this is what happens.
sorry mr. maybe tell your ex to let you know who fathered her that child?because it does not add up to anything changing a name of somebody you did not contribute a gene.that man MUST just make her pregnant so that he has a right to be naming kids.
I’m the man married to the mother of his daughter, we don’t even live in SA anymore we back in Zambia, Avondale. This guy failed to take his responsibilites as far as when the child was 8months…I met my wife when the child was about 1yr. The mother ws strugling with life coz the bastard had run away. Now that we taking care of her he wants her back…he free to take as she remains her daughter……let him not be sacared to come…his free…very much free…
BA #6 GET A LIFE.YOU ARE THE EVIL ONE.DONT YOU HAVE ANYTHING BETTER TO DO? WALITUMPA SANA.HOW CAN YOU SAY SUCH THINGS YOU MUST BE A VERY STUPID EASTENER WHO IS A TRIBLIST
Viva Zambia
It is quite annoying to find someone masquerading as you using your blog name and purveying ideas that you can’t conceive in your dullest moment. Out of the 24 letters in the alphabet; even without exercising an ounce of your mental effort, someone can come up with a unique name. Some nit wit communist in the Diaspora (Russia. thanks LT for the flags) has chosen to use my name at my expense. So whoever is blogging as Choma 1 should stop. Sorry to those who thought I had lost my mental alignment.
Choma 1,
Its disheartening to hear in this modern day & age that level of reasoning from Choma 1, dnt sow seeds of discord, your comments are in bad taste, out of context clearly from a very primitive mind. dont abuse the prviledge that LT has provided, it is meant for educative and well informed comments. your place is in the stone age not in zambia. I hope wen u sober up u will reflect on your comments, shame on you!!!!!!!!!!!!
#136 mushapu
#106 is fake check the flag
wena mulozi wa niti auna booko nji?, unobulela hande musapu wakakai, utalusangi auli ni wa fake?
#139 nitomezi .nina ni palezwi ku untwa zatalusa mu lozi wa niti.mwendi ki munyukunyuku.bantu bale ne balelekile bo sikota ku zwa mu upnd. na ninzi mwa ukraine muchaha
CHOMA1 THE BASTARD.ASK YO MAMA Y SHE GOT LAID BY A TONGA BULL.AS HK HAS MENTIONED ENVY WILL MAKE YOU HANG YOURSELF
CHOMA 1 FOOLISH GUY
TEOBE UMWANA JUST KEEP QUITE BAKUFYALILEKOFYE
eeeish sorry to hear that. If i were you i wud first of all not even bother asking on blogs becoz some comments are ridiculously stupid. Secondly, you need to seek legal advice. I dont know what govt wud change a child’s name without a statutory declaration from both parents. if either parent has passed on a death cert needs to be sighted to prove that. The woman has no right to take the child away and have the name changed.naine ndimwanakashi. if ur story is true all the way. see a good lawyer and sue their arses off for taking and changin the identity of ur child without ur consent.
#82 CHOMA1 I agree with you Tonga are very ver cruel pipo and thats why their marriages are based on worth. They marry women to work for them like KABALWES not for love! I can never ever dream of marrying a tonga man – Look at HH he got evil-like venture eyes waiting to punce on zedians.
This story is suspect and might be intended to brew up a tribalism storm. I know more tribalists from the east & north than the west or south. I am from the north-west by the way. Why, then, it is that easterners or northerners are never branded tribalists? A westerner in Chipata speaks Nyanja and an easterner in Mongu speaks Nyanja. Tell me, who is a tribalist? More northerners and easterners are known to speak their own languages even in other regions than other people from other regions!
To give you a final say, Remember motherhood is a REALITY. Ask this lady who the father of this child is. Because I have noticed in your story that this is your ONLY child. You might be claiming someone’s child. Check yourself before taking serious measures like taking legal action. If she’s not yours, kneel down to GOD and ask for children of your own. He is faithful and just. Please put yourself together and don’t get depressed.
Problem with the articles yapa lifestyle they are not complete and LT you just make us twayamba ukubwatabwata. Mulepwisha ilya lyonse. Mwaletele iyakwa that woman who was a graduate and was being wired by the hubby, next uwakubulaya nomwana nomba iyi.Ine shafilandepo nomba mpanka mulete ilyashi lyonse noti aya ama rubbish.
I Totally agree with Shinka Manyela, you ‘ve really made sense, thats why things are now gettinng out of hands and eventually giving room to shallow minded people like Choma 1 to unveil their stupidity out of their minds. By the way, why involving HH in such issues, my friend, I think you must be an enemy of progress and you need deliverance for that.
my men…go flat out and get ur daughter…i mean legally…dont fight.
Zambians please dont trust HH, you have just read what our brother has written. These Tonga people are very discriminating, hopeless characters
Just check RB’s record, where ever he has been he made sure that he put ‘bakumawa’in positions. it is suprising that even retired Christone Tembo is back expecting a position! Dont be surprised to hear Mupezeni appointed as Vice President. They say ‘wakumawa ni banja’. so who is not tribal!!
I think there is something that the guy whose daughter has been taken is not really telling us.I think he had neglected the child for some time.Anyway,whatever the case he’s got the right to know his child’s where about.My bro you will find your daughter.”its a small world after all”.Tubalondole is it still there!
Its funny how they didn’t allow you to marry the girl but gladly accepted the money for everything else…
Anyway, tribalism sucks!
Watse of time if you ask me, not worth argiung about!
PAck it in guys…Got duck hunting or something…
LT is bound to be banned for promoting tribelism. Why let sucha nonsense. Choma1 is a tribalist using your net. Please abandon this discussion now or else….
#149 HH is involved because he is running for public office.like in US anyone running for the highest office must be tested.its a pity to note that most people who are posting comments are outside the country.eventhough they are educated they are tribalistic and batutu.
You thick heads leave the president in waiting alone. You cannopt attack himm on any issue because you are as lowly educated as your leader that you do not hold any substance at all in your desparate heads.
Choma1 You are a tribalist.Y do you hate tongas and Lozis? You do not deserve to make contributions to the forum.Go to hell and burn with your crap talk.We sane zambians do not want to read your useless contributions.Most of us still believe in One Zambia one nation.
MUNTHU OBVIOUSLY YOU HELPED THE WOMAN CHANGE THE BABY NAME OLO MUMABA CHABE?AT A FEE
If u r looking for advise from LT and its bloggers forget it!
No offence but there is something you are not revealing.If you were so interested in you daughter’s life and were supportive, there would be no reason for her mother to act this way.Maybe there was something about the way you behaved back then that made her mother act this way.Irregardless of that, you are the daughters biological father and have evry legal right to see your daughter.I suggest you contact the ladys relatives and try to find out where she is.These days, even the internet can go a long way in your search.If you are financially stable use all possible means to track your daughter os she may grow up thinking that you abandoned her.
Well well well this guy must have done something we dont know. what kind of a mother would like to keep her child from their father unless he was not there for her. what kind of a man will not allow the child of the woman his married not to visit there real father. Am tonga and i look at all tribes as created by God and we are all wonderful people as Zambians
NICE WEEKEND TO YOU ALL
Ya # 162 you are head on and right on my friend. The man might have done something we dont know! Like they say ” wages of sin………………”.
Now brethren please stop this TRIBAL NONSENSE. We are all ZAMBIANS created in the image of GOD. Stop tribal sentiments. Mind you Rwandese and others are not fools.
ifeel sorry for the por guy . mine was taken to America without consent but i didnt want to fight for fear of distabilizing him . he is now 23 and have been hoping he would contct me . the father is lozi so am i . ilast traced them in illinois on the voters roll . i have letf it to nature to take its course . in my heart i love him dearly and hope to meet one day . thre a times i feel like contacting oprah winfrey xxx
Ngulube idalila msampha utaning’a is all i can say
There is something called LRF, the punks are good and might be the answer to your dilema. Call them, today!
This is one side story therefore making it difficult to advise, try talking to the girl’s relatives and then seek legal counsel, otherwise Tongas can be real tribalists, they did the same to my brother just because we are not Tongas. No. 165 you make me miss skool were I learnt such proverbs, am proud
What this all about? Helping the guy retrive the daughter or abusing the hard working tonga bulls?
#6 dont personalise. Am not a Tonga but your comment is very unfair and it must be you who is a triblist. I also have a Tonga daughter but i was treated differently. My daughter is free to come to my home and to her mothers home and we share the responsibility.
My uncle has a Tonga son who was taken by the mother when he was 4yrs old. He was allowed to live with the father when he was in grade 6. The woman in question is another charactor.
musakwa next time use a CONDOM
The tribalism being shown here is scary. I always thought that us Zambians were above such things. Ala! kanshi iyo, it is almost as if some of us want to have a civil war.
BA Tonga Mulina Vuto maningi. Ishas can’t just do without interfering. I wanted to vote for HH but now i’ve changed my mind.
The main Issue here not on Tribal grounds that is irrevant, but how this man may get to see his Child or getting her from south to stay with her. Considering you situation right noew you could seek legal advice from legal resource centre.
Hope you get to see your child one day man, just one advice thou be a responsible father.
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