Anatomy of the Current South, West and Central African Soccer Scenario

By.Dr Daniel K. Maswahu

The Case for an Unrecognized Global Soccer Platform

I must first of all forgive that portion of the readership who assume I am a soccer fan. Please don’t stop reading because some of you are several times guilty of seeking marital advise from an individual who has never been in a viable till-death-do-us-part relationship. I am not a soccer fan for the simple reason that I never place any monetary bets on whom I think will win a game. And I have not purchased that counterfeit Manchester United tee- shirt with the “Made in China” tag on the back of the neck bit. For the most part, I am a unbiased soccer sympathizer, giving my till-death-do-us-part support – sorry sympathy to the winning team. This stance (above all) leaves me with a mind open enough to learn from the mistakes of the losing team. I am therefore more than reasonably qualified to give an objective anatomic dissection of this well beloved past-time that has kept many a good man (and increasing number of women) from admission to the psychiatric wing of hospitals or contemplating open and very treasonable revolt against duly elected governments.

The prototype for the discussion that follows is Tout Puissant Mazembe, better known as TP Mazembe (tout puissant be the French equivalent for almighty). I have only scorn and ridicule for those who think this is the latest model of a heavy duty road resurfacing vehicle, but given the track record of TP Mazembe, they might as well be an all leveling beast of a machine. TP Mazembe is a Congolese soccer club that was formed in 1939 by a bunch of Benedictine Monks in what was then called Elisabethville, today nominated Lubumbashi. If you have ever wondered who or what “Bolingo” celebrated (in practically every Congolese rhumba classic) is, Lubumbashi is the place to go and look for this timeless legend. There is a theory amongst both Rhumba fans and sympathizers that the success of a Congolese musical composition is directly proportional to the number of times this name is evoked in the song. My counting becomes rather erratic after three Mosis due to the temporarily higher levels of wisdom associated with imbibing that much alcohol.

The purpose that the team was formed back then was to capture part of the population that exhibited a rather short attention span for religious matters and to thus increase the pool of potential candidates to the priesthood. I will leave the fine details of what thereafter followed to the curious reader to seek out, but below is a summary of what I consider to be more than compelling, edge –of-your-seat, shut-up-and-bring-me-some-more-popcorns-and-another-Mosi aspects of the soccer team TP Mazembe. Oh, and I have not utilized a national team for my prototype because national teams are merely derivatives of soccer clubs and as such draw their strength (or weaknesses) directly from how strong the players are at club level.

TP Mazembe was the first club from this neck of the woods (Africa for those on their 6th bottle of Mosi) to reach the finals and come runner-up in the 2010 FIFA Club World Cup (CAF). They reached the top of this mountain by first walloping all the North African, West African and which-ever African club giants and are the only club to have won the African FIFA Club Champions in two consecutive years (2010 and 2011). They then went and beat the best club champions from the rest of the world, and were only stopped short of glory by the Italian soccer jagaurnaut Federazione di Calcio Internazionale Milano S.p.A. (better known as Inter Milan to unbelievers).
The most relevant little known fact to (alleged) soccer fans is that whenever TP Mazembe walk on to the field of sporting conflict, at least half the players are from Zambia.
For those who do not believe or merely just doubt that Zambia won the 2011 Africa Cup of Nations with the help of the fallen heroes of the Gabon disaster, the history and statistics I have served above provide some rational scientific or plausible statistical alternative explanation.

Much more importantly, it provides more I-am-not-going-to-work-because- I-am-watching-football reason that we have already won the 2012 African Nations Cup and stand a more than better chance of qualifying to the Brazil World Cup come 2014. For those who still believe, I do not think our fallen heroes would mock us by starting us off on a journey they do not think we can finish.

Compared to the European, South American or Asian soccer platforms, Lubumbashi is just as far away as driving to work through Lusaka traffic if you take your flight from Ndola (or Lusaka). Instead of all our best players gaging ignorantly about wishing to play in the European leagues, the day has fully arrived that our children and younger brothers can unashamedly state their aspirations to play in the Southern and Central African soccer platform. Those who are still wondering what in money terms constitutes a viable, sustainable global soccer platform, bear in mind that TP Mazembe had at the last count annual revenue of 8 million Euros and climbing. And yes, they do have a Jose Mourihno – his name is Katumbi. Bear also in mind that Zambia in our march to victory in the Africa Cup of Nations 2011 beat teams with an excess of seasoned giants from the European leagues.

Zambian players already comprise at least half of the only African club to reach the finals of club world soccer championship so we might as well come to terms with the simple truth. The fact that this platform is unrecognized and practically unknown with only one showing at the FIFA Club World Cup makes us the underrated underdogs. Let us cherish our own brand and discipline of soccer. As much as it is futile to make coffee or tea with yesterday’s hot water, imitating soccer patterns that were valid yesterday will be our sporting downfall.

I therefore with these simple words not merely wish our sporting heroes a clear path to victory unencumbered by political and administrative bungling. The stronghold of this platform may be in Congo, but we have the advantage of better sport administration and a much more peaceful political climate in comparison. Do the maths and you will see that the victory is already ours whether we like it or not. The statistical science or numbers are on our side. The fallen heroes are on our side. We merely need to decide whether to keep this victory or give it to another less worthy.