As the big boat fast made its way to the harbour, the villagers ululated, cheered and danced joyously. The boat had finally arrived……with promises of solutions to their squalor and poverty. Kapitao offloaded countless bottles of Jameson from his cabin and asked his kandiles (hangers-on) to distribute them accordingly. It was a night of binge drinking…….they partied and danced well into the night……..

Unbeknownst to them, although those from the boat walked on two legs like the rest of them, their characters actually represented the worst of beasts, creatures and serpents one would think of…….. crocodiles, wolves, hyenas, jackals, warthogs, foxes, vampires,rabid dogs, vultures, cobras, pythons and scorpions! It was just a matter of time before they came to this realisation.

One night; once the villagers had long retired, the beasts, creatures and serpents stealthily crept into the kraal. They prowled around tirelessly until they finally found what they were looking for…….it was one of the finest in the kraal, a well fattened heifer renowned for its soft and tender beef. Their hearts were filled with glee!

The cobra immediately sprung up and sprayed its venom into the heifer’s eyes. The heifer mooed and bellowed helplessly as the venom took effect. As if on cue, the scorpion swiftly crawled from hiding and stung it on the udder……..draining all of its milk. The calf collapsed on its knees, reeling in excruciating pain. Once the calf was rendered completely visionless, they were trampling all over themselves to have their equal shares. As the vulture swept from atop a tree and gorged out its eyes, the hyena systematically dug its teeth deep into its cavity and tore off its heart while the jackal viciously snapped off a good part of the chuck.

When the beasts realised the python was literally trying to swallow the entire heifer as its head was already halfway into its mouth save for its horns, the rabid dog went for its tail and pulled it violently as the crocodile, fox and the wolf faught over the flank and hinds. In the meantime, the warthog ripped off its stomach and gobbled up the fodder while the vulture observed the proceedings with keen interest as it feasted on the eyes.

As the sun danced its way out of hiding on the Eastern horizon to take over from the moon, the beasts, serpents, creatures and vultures vanished in thin air before villagers could discover them. Everything was gone! The vulture had done a better job gathering every bit of left overs while the vampire had leaked every drop of blood.

Initially, the villagers couldn’t notice there was anything amiss in the kraal and went about with their chores. However, the beasts, serpents and creatures kept coming back under the cover of darkness to plunder the kraal as the villagers were lost in deep slumber. This was to go on for some good 7 moons until the villagers started paying attention to what Kachema, who was domiciled South of the village, had been saying all along.

“Those from the boat are plunderers…..thugs!” he would often remind those who cared to listen. “Look at what they’ve done to the kraal…..all the choice cows are gone! Unless we kick them out immediately, there’ll be nothing left in the kraal!”

One by one, they started having a change of heart…… perhaps Kachema was right after all….. As the month of August came calling, they bestowed on him custodianship of the kraal…..to protect it from further pillage.

Immediately the beasts, creatures and serpents learnt of this development, they scampered in different directions. Fearful Kachema might go after them and grab all the meat from them, they burried some of it in the ground. While a number of them still hid in the boat as it sailed around aimlessly, a few of them skipped borders and took refuge.

They waited with abated breaths in their hiding places as time elapsed……careful enough not to make any noise lest they infuriated Kachema. Now that they could no longer enjoy the spoils from the boat, pangs of hunger started biting them severely. As Kachema took long to round them up and take them to Chimbokaila where they could enjoy free beans instead of stollen beef, they finally emerged from hiding and started clamouring for attention. They’d become bolder by the day…….at times even daring Kachema.

“Ever since this Kachema instigated our eviction from the kraal,” you’d often hear them complain. “We can’t even enjoy a decent meal!”

They eventually resorted to jogging in the morning at Kapitao’s residence to rid themselves of frustration and stress. And whenever time allowed, they found themselves in the Synagogue where the papas comforted them and prophesied whatever they imagined God was revealing to them in their dreams about their return to the kraal.

They soon concocted a plan to meet at the grave where Kapitao was to make a declaration he was stepping back in the captain’s cabin since he had pretended to resign.

When the Matero mafia caught wind of this, he used ‘imingalato’ and grabbed the keys to the boat and locked it before the beasts, creatures and serpents could get in.

Prince Bill M. Kaping’a
Political/Social Analyst

By Nkonkomalimba Kafunda

As was expected, on Saturday October 28 Zambia’s 5th President Edgar Lungu announced his much anticipated return to active politics, fittingly, at the memorial service of his mentor and predecessor at State House, Michael Sata. ostensibly to save the Patriotic Front from obliteration after the humbling August 2021 electoral defeat at the hands of the United Party for National Development.

The party formed on the eve of the December 2001 general election after Mr. Sata was snubbed by 2nd President Frederick Chiluba when he anointed Levy Mwanawasa as his successor, is in fractious turmoil after its suspended Matero member of Parliament Miles Sampa convened a general conference at which he was elected President. PF Vice President Given Lubinda immediately called Mr. Sampa a stooge and openly accused President Hakainde Hichilema of sponsoring Mr. Sampa, an accusation vehemently denied by Chief Government Spokesman Cornelius Mweetwa.

While it was generally expected that the UPND as a government would be morally and ethically superior to their more nefarious predecessors, the orchestrated sinister machinations to discombobulate the PF has put paid to that lofty notion. The PF is painfully aware that there is a not so invisible, but no less powerful, hand playing the role of puppeteer to that of Mr. Sampa’s puppet.

It would be ludicrously naïve to believe that Mr. Sampa could organize a general conference complete with delegates, ballot boxes and returning officers along with a heavy protective police presence, unaided financially and materially.

Predictably, despite having only a wafer thin window of deniability, what with an incriminating video doing social media rounds, Mr. Mweetwa went ahead, insisting the troubles in the PF were of the PF’s own making. Granted, he was only doing his job which frequently entails politically necessary economy on truth.

At an October 6 Presser, held to counter Mumbi Phiri’s complaints, comments, criticisms and lack of compliments, minutes after the PF supporter’s appearance on Radio Phoenix, Mr. Mweetwa, with more clarity than wisdom, said it would not be in national interest to prosecute Mr. Lungu even though government would be able to get the numbers required to lift his immunity due to the disturbances in the PF both at the secretariat and in parliament, lending credence to speculation that the UPND had a clandestine hand in the PF civil war.

Nonetheless, there has been a gradual but steady decline in public opinion of the new deal administration. A consortium of respected Civil Society Organizations on October 25, raised concern over the shrinking democratic and civic space in the country. Freedoms of expression, assembly and association, they noted with anxiety, are under perilous threat.

This has brought to the fore the very worrying flexibility of principle exhibited by the UPND since they assumed office. Progressive legislation such as the Access to Information and the Public Gatherings Acts are seemingly on ice. Home affairs minister Jack Mwiimbu has been using the much vilified and despised {while in opposition) Public Order Act to justify police brutality and the trampling on the rights of varied groupings to assemble, protest or publicly voice dissent.

Mr. Lungu’s return coincides with a post election campaign promises crisis of expectation triggered by crippling poverty (60%) and skyrocketing cost of living which has put the UPND in the unenviable position of praying that their economic transformation agenda bears fruit in the short term, a dilemma faced by leaders who are subjected to regular, free and fair elections the world over.

The much touted debt restructuring only benefits the creditors who are now assured their money will be paid, says opposition Economic Front leader Wynter Kabimba. The accompanying IMMF bailout and world Bank concessional loans have had no tangible, positive effect on the masses. Many feel they were better off before the change of government.

Food and fuel prices are upwardly unstable. Inflation is back in double digits while the Kwacha’s volatility against major currencies is akin to a pendulum.

These indices are the canary in a coal mine.

Meanwhile, confusion continues to reign in the all-important mining sector. Amidst pomp, splendor, jubilation and jollification the nation was informed on September 5th that a deal had been sealed to return Konkola Copper Mines to the Indian investor Vandeta with fresh investment of US$ 1 billion, US$250m to pay suppliers’ outstanding arrears and US$20 million pay autumn for community projects on top of a one off cash payment of K2500 per employee across the board. As it turned out, the mines minister was forced to eat humble pie in parliament when he admitted that no concrete agreement had been reached after contractors and suppliers suspended their services for non payment of invoices. In essence Mr Kabuswe whilst acting with other known persons willingly misled the nation with intentions best known to himself, ZCCM IH and Vedanta.

Things are no better at Mopani where the secretive investor remains an enigma. The people are far from happy.

The crux of the matter is the not unjustified perception that those in leadership, their friends and relatives are not bearing the brunt of the struggling economy in equal measure, so they couldn’t care less about the people’s welfare.

The non inclusive nature of this government has not gone unnoticed. Appointments to top jobs are a particular borne of contention. The ‘tribal’ appointments are ‘a source of great embarrassment event to people associated to the bantu botatwe like myself’ says Mr. Kabimba.

Pundits like political scientists Alex Ngoma insist that the UPND need not worry as long as they deliver to the people’s expectations. As if on cue government announced the sale of eagle brand mealie meal from Zmbia National Services at K230 and K190 for breakfast and roller, respectively. Surprisingly, the opposition have kept their powder dry on the sustainability of this enterprise which some estimates suggest can only meet less than ten percent of national demand.

Another intervention seems to be in the current fuel price mechanism were the president instructed the new permanent secretary at energy to interrogate the system and come up with something more acceptable.

Though Mr. Lungu has indicated that he is only back to stabilize the party and, by extension, preserve the country’s democracy before handing the party presidency to whoever will be elected at the convention of 2026, he has in the past intimated his ambitions to hand over power to himself.

In the end, how the UPND handle the comeback will determine whether or not President Hichilema will have the unflattering distinction of having his predecessor become his successor.

Patriotic Front (PF) Member of the Central Committee for Industry, Frank Ng’ambi, has issued a warning that supporting illegal activities could lead the country into unprecedented chaos.

Ng’ambi, who is the former Member of Parliament for Chifubu in Ndola, expressed his astonishment that some Zambians are endorsing the Miles Sampa-led PF faction for conducting an illegal convention last week.

He stressed that illegal actions should not be condoned because even in the ruling UPND, there are dissatisfied members who could hold an illegal convention and replace the current party leadership led by President Hakainde Hichilema.

Appearing on Muvi TV’s special program, Ng’ambi, who represented PF Vice President Given Lubinda, emphasized that the convention that elected the suspended PF Matero Member of Parliament was illegal.

“Basically, anyone can wake up in the morning and have a convention, are they going to admit them? If that happens, are they going to admit them without the chairman of the party, without the Secretary General, without the members of their National Management Committee? Because in any political party, there are fallouts,” Mr. Ng’ambi stated.

He further questioned whether the State House is involved in the challenges faced by the Patriotic Front, adding that it may indicate that the state is acting behind these factions if they expect PF to win the 2026 election.

Mr. Ng’ambi explained that only the Secretary General of PF is authorized to call for a convention.

Regarding PF rebranding, he mentioned that the process is progressing well, evident by the inclusion of more than 20 young people in the Central Committee. He assured the public that PF will have vibrant leaders to secure victory in the 2026 general elections.

In addition, Mr. Ng’ambi asserted that the Sixth Republican President, Edgar Lungu, did not cease to be PF President after the 2021 General Elections. He noted that Mr. Lungu had taken sabbatical leave, as the PF Central Committee opposed his resignation as PF President.